Don't you shy away

twelve

||Ryana Bronwyn Caldwell||First person||

I stepped out of bed, walked to the window and while I pulled the curtains out, my eyes caught a glimpse of the bandaid on my hand. My heart sank and I quickly looked away. The guilty feeling the day after self-harm is one of the worst things ever. I sighed, went into the kitchen, made coffee and decided to listen to some music while eating breakfast to cheer me up. I put in Good day by tøp and started singing along, wondering about what Tyler said about my voice. He says I should sing more. I smiled, he is so cute. He must not see my bandaid, he'll know exactly what it's covering. I'll hide it with a hoodie, the days are already getting colder so it won't even be weird.

I got ready and left home. Met Jenna on the street so we went to Starbucks together.
"And Ryana, Tyler said it must've been a hallucination... That sounds so horrible!! But you told your doctor by now, didn't ya?"
My eyes widened. She shouldn't know that I didn't and don't want to tell any doctor about this either. I had to improvise
"Erm, yeah, I told my doc"
"What'd she say?"
"Uuhh... She said I have to go back later and talk about it with her for longer, but until then, I shouldn't be worried about it" I said, smiling reassuringly
"That's good. Tell her everything, she can help the most" oh yes of course, I thought. I don't wanna end up in a psych hospital! I would be stupid to tell any doctor.

•A FEW DAYS LATER•

Today, I went to the supermarket to buy some groceries. I was thinking about how I've never met Josh Dun even though he is the best friend and literal soulmate of Tyler. He's the drummer in their band and, of course, I've seen thousands of pictures of him that I adore (if you don't have a crush on him, you're not a human), but I'd love to meet him in person.
I was walking down the dairy aisle thinking about telling Tyler that I want to meet Josh when I saw him. Tyler was standing 15 meters away from me and looking at me with a gentle smile on his face. He probably didn't realize I noticed him. The brown eyes wandered around my face, making me blush and look away. A little smirk appeared in the corner of his lips. I decided to go and greet him.
"Hey Ty, how are you?" I asked, smiling
"Oh... Hi, Ryana! Just doing the shopping, y'know..." His cheeks turned red because he probably realized he was staring at me for a bit too long.

We finished shopping together and went home. That evening, in the shower, I felt happier than I have in a very long time. I was thinking about Tyler, how cute he was, but also how strong, carrying up the groceries for me today... His beautiful brown eyes, fluffy hair, heartwarming smile... Man, I love him so much.

And I think he does too.
:)

Author's note:

Hiii, nothing interesting, just listening to Overcompensate 24/7 xD

really short chapter, sorry, but hey, at least I finally have an idea about what's gonna happen next yayyy

Sending love to anyone who reads this
😘