La Cloche - Don't go to the forests of Auvergne

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(Illustration by Iarukalb)

So... it seems that a strange creature with a bell for a head wanders in the forests of Auvergne. I am Marc Aris, a reporter, and I was sent to cover the case. I was chosen because I am the skeptic of the company. Seriously? A bell for a head?

Well, it's true that since the testimony of this girl, many people have gone to the forest and disappeared. Some bodies - or rather, body parts - have been found. But a greyhound with a bell for a head? Let's be serious for a moment, guys. It must just be some nutjob having fun scaring people, and paranoia does the rest. That's why I'm here. To prove to everyone that it's just a completely crazy guy. I have a taser with me to defend myself if I come across him. I took a powerful one. 40,000 volts to the face. With that, I have time to run.

Okay. I'm at the entrance of the forest where this so-called creature is supposed to be. I'm going to record my entire exploration, and thus I will prove to everyone that this thing doesn't exist. However, we might get bored for a while. But oh well. Someone has to do it. I'm going to start by looking for this famous stream. It would have been easier with a guide, but the locals are so terrified by this story that they refuse to set foot in this forest. Too bad. A stream shouldn't be too difficult to find.

Oh... I don't have a path from here. Well, I'll go through the thickets... oh damn! These are brambles! Crap! I didn't think we had forests so dense in France. At the same time, this isn't really my thing. I'm a city guy. The countryside, the woods, the cows. I don't understand how anyone could like living in that. But hey, each to their own, right?

Well, I've ventured further into the forest and still no stream. However, I feel something. It's getting stronger. Damn, what's that smell? It's horrible! Damn, it's unbearable now! Damn, it looks like there's a... what is that? Ah... (laughs nervously) I was going to say "it looks like there's a dead animal somewhere." Guys, I just found something... maybe a badger. Well, what's left of it. It must have been eaten by a wolf or something like that. It's totally decomposed and only the front part of the body remains. I need to get away from it. It stinks! I can hear those who will listen to my recording, but it proves nothing at all. Any animal could have eaten this thing. But the smell is really strong. I've already moved quite a bit away and I still smell it. It makes me want to vomit. I hope it doesn't last too long. I just have to move away enough. Where is this darn stream, after all? I've really gone deep into the forest, it shouldn't be far.

I came early so it would be daylight, but the trees are really close together. I almost feel like it's already night. Except it was noon when I entered, and it's been less than an hour since I've been here.

(bell ringing)

Hey, what was that? Damn, I don't know if it was recorded. It was quite far. It might just be the church bell. Or maybe the crazy person isn't far. I'm going to follow the sound, it came from over there. I can imagine the number of superstitious scaredy-cats who just rushed in the opposite direction. Anyway, it takes me away from the dead badger. Even though the smell is still there. And it's getting thicker. My jeans are good for the trash when I get home. I will definitely be booed by all those who believed in it, for breaking the myth, but the vast majority of skeptics will thank me for restoring the truth. (laughs) I can't wait to see the look on my boss's face when I come back with the evidence. She who believes in all this nonsense, she will finally stop sending us to cover so-called monster sightings! I can't count the number of hikes around Loch Ness or in the Himalayas she's made me do. And that's just the most famous ones. Well, it allows me to travel for free, but still. Did she really expect me to capture a photo of the monster or the Yeti? I'll have to remember to cut that part of the recording before giving it to her.

Well, where was I? I don't hear the bell anymore. I'm sure it was just the church in the distance. Maybe there was never anything in this forest and the so-called missing people don't even exist. Some jokes can go too far sometimes. Well, if that's it, it's really lame to have traveled so far for... OH SHIT! But it's... oh my god, it's... I feel sick... (vomits) The smell... the smell didn't come from the badger... damn... I think I found the killer's hideout... there are body parts and blood everywhere... oh my god, it's... it's disgusting... There are... animal parts... but also human... there are heads! Everything is piled up... I'm going to... I'm going to... (vomits again) It's horrible... damn... what kind of psycho can do this kind of thing...? Damn, I need to get out of here!

(bell ringing)

(whispering) He's right behind me... (loud voice) Hey, you asshole! You won't get me that easily! I'm not going to... oh shit... shit, what is that?!

(Bell ringing)

Damn... damn, it's not human! No... no!! NO!! AAAAAAAAAAAAH (dies)

"This recording was found on the road near the mentioned forest. The tape recorder was covered in blood, analyzed as that of Marc Aris. The journalist has not been found. Authorities will establish a security perimeter around the forests in Auvergne and prohibit access until the said creature is found and neutralized. We ask the population not to go to the forests of Auvergne."

(Bell ringing)

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