Romano Siblings

64| Move on.

Lissy Romano

There is always something to say. But I'm still not speaking. It has been a week and I just nod or shake my head in response to their questions.

I miss my voice, even the jokes and how I used to tease my brothers. I always got what I wanted, they did everything I asked.

I just have to ask.

But I can't.

Domenico is still sitting next to me, asking me so many questions. He said that it's important for him as a doctor to know the answers.

We already moved past the basic questions and now he is asking me about the physical things.

"What happened to your fingers, Lissy?" He looks at the splinter and I shake my head. The memories are too depressing and traumatizing, I don't want to remember them.

"You can write it down, if it's easier for you." He gives me a notebook and a pen. I don't take it, I shake my head again.

"Sorellina..." Domenico starts, but my movements stop him. I take that stupid notebook. If he wants to know, whatever. He already looks at me differently, like the rest of my brothers. I don't have anything to lose.

"I don't want to pressure you into telling me, but it will be better if we know. So we can help you." I bite my lower lip so hard that I taste the blood. I quickly lick it off and swallow.

What do you want to know?

I show him the notebook and his eyes soften. "Is there anything you want to start with?" I know his tactics, Paolo used this to get the information out of me.

No

"Oh, okay then. Maybe we can start with...how did it happen? Well, we know that they tricked you to get into their car, but what happened after that?" He asks and I clench my jaw. I hate that I was so naive. So fucking stupid. It's never going to happen again.

I had a weird feeling. I started to ask questions. They threw my phone out of the window.

My heart pounds so fast, tears escape my eyes.

Then they started to touch me. I couldn't stop them. Everything happened so fast, I lost consciousness.

He reads it and his face saddens, his fists clench. "Oh, Lissy. I'm so so sorry." He says, that doesn't change anything. It makes me feel even worse. I don't need his or anyone else's pity.

I woke up in a dark and cold room, I tried to get out, but the door was locked. Then they all came inside, ripped my clothes off and started to grope me

I can't write it, my eyes are full of tears and my vision is blurry. I can't see, so I just show it to him.

"Lissy, you don't have to tell me anything if you don't want to." He assures me. I shake my head.

He wanted to know. So go ahead and know it. Know everything that happened. Read it and take the pain away from me. Take it all.

I tried to fight them off. I tried to, I swear on my life. That's what happened to my fingers, they broke it one by one, just because I didn't let them rape me.

Domenico's eyes darken, he is furious. He masks it so well though.

I don't know if they did it. They touched me everywhere, but when it came down to the last step, I kept biting, kicking and punching even with broken fingers. They held something white over my nose and mouth and I passed out every time.

"Do you think that they did it when you were unconscious?" My brother asks. This couldn't get any worse. It's awkward and embarrassing.

I don't know. There was blood, but my whole body was covered with it. And every part of my body was sore. They couldn't do it when I was conscious, what they did with my body when I couldn't stop them is something I don't know.

He nods his head, "Do you want to know?" this is the question I didn't want to hear.

I shake my head and throw that notebook away. I turn my back on him and hide under the blanket.

"Lissy, please let us help you. Maybe if you know the answer to that question, you will be able to move on." I sit up and push him away. My face full of disgust and anger.

"I didn't mean it like that, sweetheart. I'm sorry." He says and I point my index finger at the door. I want him to leave me alone.

He doesn't make a move to leave. I grab the notebook and quickly scribble.

Go away. I don't want to see you right now. Move on? Move on? I hope that you Never, and I mean never go through the things I went through. And that your older brother who is supposed to support you, won't tell you the words you said to me seconds ago. And now get the fuck out of the room!!!

I shove it into his face and lay back down. He sighs and stands up. "Lissy, please forgive me. I never meant it that way. I'm so sorry." He says and leaves.

I can't just move on. How can he even think like that. That's what they all think. Yeah. They think that I'm overreacting, overthinking. I just have to get over it.

But I can't, I can't do it. No, no, no. I can't do it. My body is shaking, trembling and I'm crying. I sniffle quietly, I want to move on, but I don't know how.

I don't know what to do. I don't want to know the answers. I just want them to understand that I'm in pain. That I hate myself, I hate that I was so weak, that I am so weak.

I want to be strong and powerful enough to protect myself. What if I need to keep myself safe from the evil world again?

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Author's note...

Hello, readers!
I don't know what to say, I'm half asleep.
I hope that you enjoyed this chapter though.
I hope that you have a great morning/day/night.

Sending love,

XeniaAxi