Leave Before You Love Me

WALLS UP, TEARS DOWN

Michelle

She makes me happy. The short time that we just met and got together is something that I treasure. Though it was just a temporary arrangement, I'm still glad that at least I met someone like her.

I know she's putting her walls down for me, brick by brick, albeit slowly. What I thought was an arrangement that would only last for a couple of days or two weeks tops, had lasted into more than a month. There wasn't any label on it, of what we have.

It's not something that I think would do good for the both of us, having feelings for one another will only cause more heartbreaks and my heart could only take so much. But slowly I'm getting addicted to her, that I know is true. It can't happen, though.

—

My friend Max suspects that something's going on with me. Right, something has been going on with me for God knows how long, I'll bet she has the wrong idea about what's up with me. She didn't need to know that I'm taking home a gorgeous woman almost every night and if I'm lucky; she stays and spends the whole day with me too.

"I thought you're not coming in tonight? I already asked another bartender to cover for your shift. Why are you here?" She said, while she's busy looking at something on her computer.

I plopped down on the chair in front of her desk table, drumming my fingers. "Boredom. I'm currently writing a song for Abe and I need a little inspiration."

"And being here in the pub inspires you?"

"No, talking to people does. Aren't you tired of listening to that song? I didn't know you're such a huge fan." I teased when a familiar song played on the speaker, it's the song that my brother has composed.

She shook her head. "It's FM radio. No time to tap on my phone for my playlist. Too many orders for the pub I have to do."

I hummed, busy looking at my phone. Staring at the picture Ann had sent me, she looks stunning wearing a lab coat.

She's quite the popular doctor and I'm sure that's why she and her friend had stumbled upon this pub is because they wouldn't get recognised, considering most of our patrons and regulars are middle-aged men and women, well there were young customers too, who likes to watch an open mic or they just have no choice but to come here because the other places are full.

Unlike my brother and my sister, who are both very well known in their own crafts, I‌ didn't want that. Although Abe was always including my name in the credits whenever he produced an album, I still didn't want to step into the limelight. While my sister, of course, she's a corporate lawyer, I guess handling famous corporate cases and always winning them will help you get recognised and get famous.

But that's not the life I wanted.

"If you want to get inspired, travel to the countryside. Fresh air and I know you love the quiet when you write. The best place to think would be at your parents' house." She suggested. "Don't grimace at my suggestion, like it's the most horrible place on the planet. Why do you dread going home so much, anyway?"

Being my best friend who has always been there for me, she's like an adopted sister to me and my siblings and she knew the answer to that question already.

"I am the youngest and the runt of the litter, when I'm there, it reminds me I am really that person in our family. I appreciate it, I do. But they tend to go overboard, stressing themselves out and I don't want that. No matter how many times I tell them I'm okay, I think a part of them would never believe that."

"They just love you, they're your family, so it's normal that they worry about you. Just be glad that they have no plans on moving here to the City."

I chuckled humourlessly at that. "But sometimes I wish for them to not worry about me that much. I'm alright, I've already accepted everything. And mum doesn't have to be here to check on me, Maxine is already doing the job for her." I said, still busy texting Ann while she's at work.