P4L, carpe diem (JJ Maybank)

048

"It's in... it's in the drain," JJ said while Pope remarked his statement.

"Damn it," I swore, rubbing my temple.

"Of course it is," Kie scoffed.

JJ began rummaging around in his bag. "Good thing I brought the crow," he said, meaning his trusty crowbar.

"So, are we gonna do like, rock, paper, scissors?" Kie asked.

"No," JJ answered.

"Or alphabetically?"

"Nah. On three, Pope. Onetwothree." They pushed, causing the wire to almost come off like a spring.

"Or, like, the oldest goes?"

"Kie," I laughed, "you're only saying that because you're the youngest."

"Thanks for saying that out loud, Dyl."

"No problem," I answered, clicking my tongue.

"In the sewer," JJ began, "there's this worm that you get when you're down there. It gets into your blood, and then it has to come out of your pecker. So, uh... that would be a hard pass for me."

"Yeah, that's gonna be a no for me," Pope agreed.

I looked at Kie, and we both smirked.

"Sounds like a challenge, boys. You little wimps. You see, as much as that glorious statement JJ just said, woman have to bleed every month for a week for practically their whole life. Not to mention cramps, cravings, practically making their significant others live in hell as their slaves for a few days," I explained, with a cocky laugh.

"Dylan's right. You guys are scared," Kie said.

"Pure lil' wussy pussies," I agreed.

"I'm not scared," JJ scoffed. Pope began agreeing with him, talking to Kie.

"No, it's really attractive, JJ. Like, really-"

"It's the pecker things."

"I'm NOT scared."

"You should've led with that. You don't have to be a pair of pussies. I'll do it," I joked, looking back at Kie. "Plus, I'd rather have me go in than have my boyfriend's pecker screwed up. I like it how it is currently. I'll do it."

"Madam, will you join me on this escapade?" I asked in a British accent.

"Of course."

"Okay," Pope agreed. "Be careful."

"I'll be so careful," Kie scoffed, as I climbed into the drain in front of her.

JJ sighed, looking at me as I turned around. "Just be safe, Dylan. Alright?"

I shrugged. "Fine."

"I mean it, you ass!"

"I mean it too, you douche!" I laughed, continuing to climb in the drain.

"Just, uh, holler if you need anything. Well, uh...we'll holler back," JJ shouted, as me and Kie crawled through the drain.

"Yes, MOM," I repeated.

"Dylan, you better stop hangin' around with that boyfriend of yours. He seems like a real troublemaker, that one," Kie mimicked, giving her voice a higher pitch.

"I like trouble, Mom!" I whispered, in the same tone as Kie.

I could hear JJ mumble to Pope. "Hear that? She likes my—"

...

Me and Kie continued to crawl through, in the disgusting muck of God-knows-what.

"Dyl, Kiara? Find anything yet?" Pope shouted at us.

"Be patient, Mumma Pope!" I answered back.

"That is no way to speak to your Mumma Pope, young lady!" JJ joked, as I rolled my eyes. "But seriously, do you see the gun?"

"Nothing!" Kie sighed.

"It's probably at the bottom of the catch basin!"

"Oh, greaaaat," I answered, as I saw the catch basin a few crawls ahead.