Warnette Oneshots

Insecurities

A/N - I'm soo sorry for not updating in a long time! I'll get back to updating.

TW - EATING DISORDER, SELF HARM

Only read if you are comfortable

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Ella's POV:

I'm so tired. People are still judging me for my 'power', even though I've already controlled it. I have shown them what I could do, I have shown them I only wanted to do good things, yet they are still bringing up my past. I'm starting to believe that I will always be that monster everyone is afraid of.

With my clothes on the floor, I hug myself so tightly. I desperately wanted someone to hold me. To tell me I'll be okay, but no one is here. Dog; out on a walk with Aaron, and everyone else is busy with their own problems. It's not simple being so insecure about something you can't control. Everyone makes it as if it is your fault, and that if you could've maybe tried harder I wouldn't be picked on.

I know that Aaron will be back soon. I know that I shouldnt relapse, but I find myself locking myself in the bathroom sobbing uncontrollably. I stare down at the shinning sparkles of that knife I had locked away. Picking it up slowly, it grazes my skin. I press it down so lightly but to no surprise - blood flows out. I'm so dissapointed in myself. I had promised Aaron I would stop, he'd be disappointed in me, too. 

I get up and bandage myself after cleaning the small cut I had done to myself. I'm shaking a lot as I clean up a bit of the blood that had dropped onto the floor.

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Aaron's POV:

Dog is running laps betwen and around my legs. He's smilling so happily as if I had given him a bunch of treats. That made me smile back at him. I sigh and start walking back to our house, Ella's and mine. She should be at breakfast, so I take off the leash on Dog after locking the door. Walking up into our bedroom, I see Ella. She's laying down, her back facing me. I can sense that she's not okay.

"Love, shouldn't you be at breakfast?"

"I'm not hungry," she answers almost immediately without looking at me. I walk into the bathroom, she's lying to me. While walking in, a drawer pokes me. It had always been locked, now it's open. Curiously, I open it and see a mall dagger. My mind drifts off to the many possible reasons for this. Has she relapsed?

I glare at the dagger, and walk out into the bedroom. "Have you-" I couldn't even finish my sentence before she starts crying, her small sniffles break me. I walk towards her and bend down beside her.

"Show me, love," I speak in the most gentle way possible, and she rolls up her sleeve.

"I'm so sorry, I didn't want to but-" she keeps apologizing. It's not her fault. I listen to her explain why. I'm filled with anger. How could they make fun of their Surpreme Commander? Of my wife?

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To anyone who is suffering with this, just know that it'll all turn out okay soon enough. You are good enough, if you need someone to talk to, I'm available.