Total Drama Action (Lewis McLean)

Top Dog

/// Beth ///

"I totally heard every word! Well. . . almost every word. I dozed off around page nine, section three, paragraph four. . . then again, on page twenty two, section eleven, paragraph eight. Poor Duncan!"

/// End ///

I huffed, and dropped the stack of papers on the table, before sitting down with everyone else. It made a loud thud as it hit the table, and knocked Courtney out of her thoughts. She looked up from the papers to see me, clearly not very pleased with her. Duncan sighed, and looked up. "Hey, babe. . ." She obviously wasn't happy to hear that. 

"Duncan! I believe we agreed that only I would engage in the use of pet names. It's on page three, section five. You promised to memorize that letter verbatim!" I blinked at this. It was getting worse the more I heard. "I- I will, I will. . . I'm just. . . really tired right now. Aren't you?" Owen and Beth looked at each other in worry.

Courtney ignored his question. "Don't worry, I forgive you. Just like I forgave the three hundred and sixteen minor transgressions I outlined in my letter. . . but, I expect you to memorize that letter, so it doesn't happen again!" "Anything for you, bab- Courtney. . ." "You may hold me now." She said, as if it were something to be grateful of.

". . . Anyone else think this is already bad?" I said, whispering at Owen and Beth. Owen, though, was actually gagging. "I know, this is sickening!" Beth said with folded arms. She turned her head to Owen, and we both found he was actually choking. She literally pushed me out of the way to fail the Heimlich manoeuvre, because Owen got it out himself.

He panted for breath, but my attention was brought away when Courtney's phone loudly beeped. "New message? I- I just need to check. . ." Dad put a stop to that, and when I looked up at him, he had a parrot on his shoulder.

Well, I'm guessing this is either an animal-themed movie, or a horrible, human-mutation movie.

 "Attention, cast!" The parrot squawked, and Duncan raised a brow. "Dude, what's with the flying rat on your shoulder?" "It's a-" I began, but, of course, Dad cut me off. "It's my new BFFF. Best Flying Friend Forever!" "Never say that again." I said out loud, folding my arms. ". . . That brings us to today's movie genre. . . the animal buddy flick!"

Everyone raised a brow at him. "Well- YOU try coming up with twenty six movie genres! It was either animal movies, or guy in a coma movies, and SOMEBODY wanted the second option!" He argued, a whine in his voice. I rolled my eyes at his childishness. "The hallmark of animal buddy flicks is animal-slash-human bonding. First, the human and the animal start out as enemies, then through many misadventures, animal and human grow to care about each other, and become fast friends."

The parrot, much to my shock, rubbed up against Dad, and, although it looked happy, it bit him anyway. He narrowed his eyes. "You guys, just. . . hang tight for a second, okay?" I immediately knew his intent, and swiftly took it off him. "I thought you said we WERN'T harming animals on set. Keep your promise, jerk." I muttered, walking outside with the poor bird.

I did not like how it nuzzled up against my hand. "No- You gotta. . . we gotta let you go, dude." It stayed in my hand, and refused to leave, despite me literally pulling it off my hand. "Parrot dude, you gotta go. They're gonna cook you, man!" Not a care in the world. In fact, it hopped up to my shoulder, and nuzzled against my face, purring like a CAT.

With a defeated sigh, I put a hand to my head. "Fine. . . another animal to my collection. . . just don't eat my mice, 'kay?" It squawked, seemingly promising me that it wouldn't. I walked back inside, trying to brush off the fact that this exotic bird wasn't enthusiastic to leave me. "Right. The first animal buddy challenge will be to pick an animal, and teach it to be like you. Shouldn't be too hard, since you're all animals!"