if you call for me, i'll run to you | a doug ross fanfiction

93.

93.
be still my heart
February 14, 2000

i put on a cream coloured turtle neck along with a red little button up cardigan. as sad as this valentine's day was, i at least wanted to look festive.
i dressed juliette up in a pink onesie with little hearts all over it.
and off we went, into the cold chicago weather like usual.

it was just noon when i arrived to daycare with juliette. i handed her to the worker.
"it's gonna be a long day honey" i smiled
"will you be able to pick her up before we go home?" the nurse asked
"eight o'clock, right?"
she nodded
"i'll be here" i smiled
i got off at ten. usually eight to ten wasn't too busy anyways.
——
i could tell the kids in school were having fun because i had three little six year olds complaining of a stomach ache.
"what did you guys eat?" i asked
"i think i'm gonna be sick" the little girl, samantha said.
"me too" another kid, matthew sid
"okay" i smiled
i grabbed a little dish for them to puke in but the girl missed and puked all over my lab coat and sweater.
the puke looked like a interesting shade of pink.
that's when i knew what the ate, was too much candy.
"alright, angels, if you need to puke again, can you do it in this bowl for me?"
samantha nodded her head
"i'll be right back, okay, nurse chuny will get you all better"
the boy nodded his head.
"okay, chuny, let's get them all on some
saline"
"sure thing" she laughed
i walked out to the admit desk.
"looks like you're having fun" carol smiled
i looked down at myself, covered in puke.
"looks like candy hearts to me"
carol and i looked at the turquoise and purple chunks that stained my coat.
"that's disgusting" she laughed
"luka, carol, we got an incoming trauma" haleh shouted
"i'll meet you guys there in a second" i said, throwing my coat and sweater in my locker. i stuck my id on my pants, running out of the room. 

"i'll take over compressions" i told benton, elizabeth came in the room.
i started cpr on this man. a family got into a car accident. it was obvious that the parents weren't going to make it though.
carol and luka came in the room.
"the mothers dead" she said, blank faced.
god.
"should we help prepare for a thoracotomy?" luka asked, i shook my head.
"no, he probably tore his aorta"
elizabeth and benton were looking at the wound in between compressions.
i called time of death.
"who's gonna tell the children?" elizabeth asked
"we will" carol said, luka and her walked out of the room.
i shook my head.
"those poor kids" i sighed, taking my gloves off.
"the kids might want to see them"
"i'll clean them up good" lily nodded.
i picked up a piece of bloodied gauze off the floor, putting it into the trash bin.
what a valentines this is..
———
surprisingly, my day was more than half over. i sat in an exam room and scribbled in my charts. lucy was on the phone, trying to get a hold of psych.
"still nothing?" i asked
"i'm on hold" she sighed, rolling her eyes.
we were silent.
i looked down at my finger and spun my ring around.
"do you ever think of what someone is thinking about before they die?"
"that's a pretty dark question, dr. l/n" she laughed
"i know"
i shook my head.
"i didn't mean it like that"
"just, these parents from that trauma earlier"
"i bet they were so worried"
"so sad for those kids of theirs"
"i bet they're grateful that the kids are alive, though"
"yeah" i nodded
"i sure would be"
i put my pen down.
"it's funny how parenthood changes your views on life"
"i bet" she smiled
"still no answer?" i asked, pointing to the phone.
"no" she laughed
i thought for a minute
"why don't you take the chart up to psych?"
"i was going to"
"but carter won't give me the time of day"
"i can talk with him if you want"
"no, it's okay" she said, beginning to walk out of the door. 
"i you're gonna be a great psychiatrist" i smiled
"thank you dr. l/n" she grinned
"and if you need me to take over this case later, let me know"
———
the er had died down and the annual valentine's day party was taking place soon.
i was sitting at the admit desk, filling out my charts.
mark passed by the desk.
"all those years of valentine's day with no plans and look at you now"
i tilted my head "heading out?"
"ha, ha"
"dinner with elizabeth and our parents" he smiled
"how fun" i smirked
he nodded his head "it should be"
"have a good night, y/n"
"you too mark" i smiled
i looked at my watch, it was about 7:45.
"malik, if anyone asks, i'm upstairs at daycare okay?"
"sounds good"
i headed up the stairs.

when i came back down from daycare, the party had already started.
i sat next to carol, who was eating cake.
"never thought i'd spend my night eating blue cake" she said
"what a romantic valentine's day, huh?" i laughed
abby walked up to us.
"do the patients not mind the music?" she asked, setting down a chart.
loud music played near the trauma rooms and the staff was dancing in the hallway.
i shrugged, bouncing juliette on my lap. so did carol.
"never thought about it"
"y/n" carter said, he looked out of breath
i nodded my head.
"do you know if lucy discharged that patient?"
"the schizophrenic one?"
"yeah"
"she was suturing lacs about a half an hour ago in curtain three"
"alright, thanks" he said, walking off.
i turned my head back to carol and luka
"ever heard of a candle light dinner?" carol asked luka
"it slipped my mind" he smiled
"croatians are supposed to be romantic" she smiled
"you'll see" luka smirked
i shook my head, looking at juliette as she played with my stethoscope.
i bounced her on my two knees, she let out a giggle.

a/n: i hope you enjoyed!! i will be posting the next part tomorrow, just because it coordinates with this one and i don't want to keep you waiting to read it. more interesting parts are in the near future, so stay tuned.
xx