Sovereign

Branch (Chapter 1)

As I approached the doorstep, a mix of nervous excitement took over. The words I wanted to say hung in the air, creating a bit of tension. Though I had practiced saying them, the thought of sharing my feelings made my heart race. In the quiet before speaking, doubts crept in. What if her response wasn't what I hoped for? The fear of her not feeling the same made my palms feel a bit sweaty. Standing there, I felt unsure. Expressing my feelings meant risking the current balance of our relationship. Yet, deep down, I wanted to be honest and real. Despite the nervousness, there was a spark of hope. Maybe Poppy felt the same way.

Poppy...Poppy...Poppy...

Her name filled my head to the brim. The thought of her bright pink hair glowing in the sunlight made my heart skip a beat, maybe even three. In a world that often left me feeling frustrated and disappointed, there was one exception: Poppy. While I couldn't help but hate people, Poppy's kindness and vibrant spirit became my rare source of light in this dim world. She brought out the best in me, she is my motivation. And I needed to know if she felt a fraction of the way I did.

I took a deep breath, embracing the nerves as I prepared to share my feelings and explore the possibility of a deeper connection.

"Hey Branch!" a preppy and distinct voice called after me. Without even turning around, I knew the beauty that was behind that voice. My heart raced like a rhythmic drumbeat, a lively tempo echoing in my chest. Encountering her outside her house caught me by surprise; she typically doesn't leave her home for another fifteen minutes. It's not like I'm stalking her; I just happen to pass by when she leaves her cottage every day.

Badum, Badum, Badum

Fortunately, Poppy remained oblivious to the emotions swirling within me. Had she glimpsed the astonishment etched across my face, the depth of my feelings would have been laid bare. Swiftly, I hid my features with a mask of cool, bordering on emotionless, before pivoting towards her.

Before me stood a vision of divinity, Poppy, wearing her enchanting green strapless dress. Her long, lively pink hair put up in a flawless high ponytail, a signature style that accentuated her radiance with effortless grace.

"Hey, Poppy," I grumbled in a low, scratchy voice, taking a step closer. She inhaled sharply, looking up at me. Her eyes, a deeper shade of pink, hinted at something more—maybe desire. Desire for me? Desire for what I might do to her had we been alone somewhere else, in a world where she would give me a chance? But that seemed crazy, right? She's a magnificent Queen of pop, and I'm just a poor orphan. A poor orphan that put up the front of not giving a damn about anyone... even her. Fuck. Should he get it over with and just tell her? But the doubt crept in, once small but it quickly grew into a roaring beast, a beast that growled, "You are nowhere near good enough for her." It was my voice that I heard, my own self doubt. I-I knew that. I knew I wasn't good enough for her, so I needed to keep my feelings to myself. Even though, when I looked at her, I saw a future filled with love and brightness. I wanted to treat her like the Queen she is, ready to do anything for her. But I knew I had to keep my feelings a secret. She deserves someone who can take care of her and her kingdom financially, not someone like me. Someone that ran away and hid in the face of danger—granted, I have come out of my shell since meeting her. However, the coward that dwells in me is enough to question everything. It's why I haven't been able to tell her, and is the reason I will refrain from telling her now.

My love for her runs deep, so I'll do what's best for her, even if it means letting go of my own dreams, no matter how much I want them. No matter how much I dreamt of her.

This is for the best...

"What are you doing here?" She tilted her head, a teasing smile playing on her lips as those words danced out. My gaze flickered down to her lips—the gloss calling out to me—then back to her eyes. I almost—almost—succumbed to her charm. However, I resisted, walking right past her. "Just walking around, happened to end up here. But don't worry, I'm leaving now," I replied, continuing my stride away.

As I moved away, she called after me, "Uh... Ok! But you're coming to the dance tonight, right?" I turned around briefly, my hand in my pockets, nodding in agreement. "Yes." Turning back around, I jogged away, distancing myself not just physically but from the swirling emotions within.

I start singing a song from my band, Brozone.

"All I know when I'm with you

You got the right stuff, baby

Love the way you turn me on

You got the right stuff, baby

You're the reason why I sing this song

You're all I ever wanted

You're all I ever needed, yeah

So tell me what to do now

When I want you back."

As I finish the song, I reach my doorstep. Inhaling deeply, I exhale and mutter, "Well, let's get ready for this party." A ripple of unease courses through me with those words, a gut feeling, a bad one. My gut has never led me astray. Tonight's party... feels off, and I can't shake the notion.

Yet, I dismiss it, reminding myself that Poppy's parties never go wrong. Then again, the memory of the last one lingers—the one that ended in the kidnapping of her friends by the Bergens. Surprisingly, it became a turning point for me, a silver lining in the chaos that helped me rediscover myself and recognize what Poppy truly means to me. It also ended with her insufferable fiancé Creek, and her breaking up. But nothing like that should happen again, right? I shake my head, and with a twist of the doorknob, I enter my home.