The Aftermath of Callie and Arizona - Volume II

Love Never Comes Without Struggle

As I walked over to the couch where Becca was stationed, I handed her a water bottle. She meekly accepted my offer as I sat on the opposite side of the couch. I opened the water bottle and took a drink before saying, "Becca, what I'm about to say may offend you, but feel it needs to be said."

"Arizona, you won't offend me, so, go ahead. I know I deserve admonishment for my actions, just say what you need to say to me." Becca sighed as she finished her thought and buried her face in her hands for a few seconds.

"Becca, first thing's first, I'm sorry I acted abruptly upstairs, but you have to appreciate the scene you created when you walked in. It's not my normal routine to push my guests out a door as soon as they arrive."

Becca silently, but apologetically nodded in affirmation after I spoke. She looked complacent and somewhat settled as she waited for what else I had to say.

"Second, what in the actual HELL is wrong with you?!"

Oh well, I guess even though I tried to forget the fiery side of my personality, it was still there after all. I noticed Becca sit up a little taller right after that.

"Trust me when I tell you I have way more to say about the party I'm currently missing upstairs. Unfortunately, I need to table that topic for the moment. As pissed as I am with you for creating the scene you just did, do you know how mad I am at you for how you've been carrying on with Teddy since August?"

Becca had a solemn, but utterly afraid look on her face as she nodded, yes. 

"I've suspected how you and Callie must be feeling, despite the fact you've only been hospitable to me and not said much of anything."

"Becca, Teddy is my friend and has gotten me through a lot of shit in my life. I have been at my absolute lowest with Teddy in so many moments! Times where it was life or death for Callie and Sophia. Times where it was life or death for me. Times when I've temporarily lost Callie and then the time where I REALLY lost Callie, and Sophia as a result. There were times that made me question everything and everyone in my life. Times that made me wonder if and how I could go on. Do you know the one person that never left my side throughout all of the crap I've gone through? Teddy. She never questioned my feelings or emotions, she just stood by my side and helped me reason what to do, without judgement. She didn't care that I was gay, straight or anything else... she just cared about me as a friend. I didn't grow up with a sister, but she's the best sister and friend anyone could ever have. I know that seems like a lot to explain, but felt it needed to be said before I say anything else."

I saw the tears well-up in Becca's eyes as I took a deep breath after my monologue and exhaled loudly. I felt myself calm down and fully regain my composure by then.

"Becca, Teddy is a beautiful woman that deserves all the love and respect she pays to the people in her life. She's not someone that deserves to be treated with any less respect than she gives."

"Arizona, I know that and admit I have been horrible to her during the time we've known each other. It's just that, I'm not sure that I want to be..." Becca's words faded off as she deeply sighed.

"You mean, gay? Or is it, Queer? Maybe, Bisexual? Is it that you're hung up on a label Becca, or is it that you're hung up on not being straight? In the end, what does any of it matter if you're with the person you love? If you're not in love with Teddy, then let her go, but if you are in love with her, what the hell is wrong with you? I've watched you treat her horribly the last half of this year! Are you trying to crush her spirit, or just deeply wound her because from my perspective, I can't tell which it is."

And that would be the exact moment I watched Becca break down into tears, but it wasn't just tears as much as it was full body-shaking and sobbing. Despite the level of anger I had, I felt bad for making my friend feel so uncomfortable and changed my position so I would be next to her on the couch. Clearly I had touched a nerve and was about to find out what I had stirred up.