H O N E Y [Felix Catton]

•E L E V E N•

[Sorry about that last chapter... started convulsing over that picture 😋 anyways back to the story lmao]

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I've been chainsmoking menthol cigarettes all day.

Book in one hand, cig in the other.

My mind is in a constant state of repeat, replaying the same moment over and over again.

His hand around my throat, the stinging feeling in my eyes. How I couldn't see anything except for a silhouette.

There have been times like this, where all I could do was sit and think.

Like when my mother passed away.

We had known for awhile that she was sick. Although she never liked going to the doctors. She said it reminded her of death, as if she could feel it in the air. However when she started coughing up blood, I practically dragged her to the clinic.

The doctors said it was lung cancer, Which made sense. My mum smoked whole packs within the span of a day. She was a retired fashion designer, and despite all our money she decided to rent out an apartment for us in London. Life was good there. After we found out mum was sick, Elspeth insisted she stay at Saltburn with us.

I don't know how she had been friends with Elspeth, but from what I know their friendship went back for years. A retired designer and a retired model. It might have been that Elspeth had some sort of warm place in her heart for my mum, but I don't know.

Anyways, we moved to Saltburn and life was relatively peaceful. She was still coughing up blood, and she was extremely achey, but I still had hopes she would get better.

Until she didn't.

She became bed-ridden, and Elspeth had her best private doctors and physician's taking care of her. Despite everyone's best efforts, she died in her sleep.

After the funeral was the worst part. Because even though I was struck with grief, at my all time low, the Catton's continued on as normal. It was only Felix who had truly comforted me while I was in my time of need, the only one who would get me out of bed and convince me to eat in the morning.

That's the problem with the Catton's. As Venitia had said; they always kept up with appearances.

The sun was now setting, and I was at my favourite spot to watch it. The roof. Me and Fekix had discovered how to get up here when we were eleven. Ever since then, sunrises and sunsets could never be indulged in the way they were up here.

I stub our my last cigarette, watching it fall down onto the concrete below me. I dog-ear my book, sighing as my eyes drift back to the perfectly lined trees in the courtyard.

I should probably stop smoking.

"I thought I'd find you here."

I hear Felix behind me, and I whip my head around quickly. But my expression soon dulls as I notice the frown on his face.

In fact, he wasn't just frowning. His eyes looked... so sad. I haven't seen them like that in a while.

"What's wrong?" I say, shuffling over so he can sit down.

"I think you were right about Ollie." He sighs, facing forwards.

I tut, cocking my head to the side.

"Well I did-"

"You did say. I know. But I just... I thought he was better then that. I hoped he was better then that."

"Better then what, him and Vee?"

He shakes his head no before flopping his head down to our hands, which were inches from eachother. He puts his palm ontop of my hand, and the warm feeling that shoots through my arm catches me off guard

"No. He did something else. It's really bad, Ci. Like, the worst thing you can think of."

I instantly think back to the bathroom, and I start to wonder if Oliver had made the stupid mistake of pulling that weird fucking move for the second time.

"You can tell me."

He pauses, pressing his lips together before replying.

"You know how I told you his dad had died, and that his mother had like, serious drinking problems?"

"Yes?"

"He lied. I took him to them today just as a birthday surprise, because I had the impression she was sober. It turns out she was sober, in fact she has no drinking problem at all. And to msor things even worse, his father is still alive. I mean, what the fuck!"

My eyes can only widen as he rambles. But a wave of relief washes through me. I know it sounds bad, but I genuinely felt more at ease that Felix had finally gathered that Oliver was not a good person.

"Oh god, that's terrible." I sigh, resting my head on his shoulder.

"After his party, I'm going to make him leave. Its too late for us to cancel the whole thing, so I'll just have to put up with him until then."

"Fucking hell, I completely forgot about that party." I say with a scoff. "I don't even no what to wear."

"You could go as every other girl." He says, and I look up to see he's smirking.

"And that is?"

"A slutty fairy."

I roll my eyes and he chuckles, nudging me slightly.

"Not funny. And anyways, I'd bet you'd like to see that, wouldn't you?" I tease and he raises his arms in defence.

"I'm not one to object."

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[Sooo sorry for short chapter, but I promise you next chapter coming with make up for it <3]