HOTEL ROOM. (matt sturniolo) (contains smut)

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comments are already going crazy on my recent and I don't even know how to feel about it, I guess I just feel so confused to the point where I have no room left for any other emotions

I hear the glass door slide and I turn my head to see who opened it, it was chris, thank god

I let out a shaky breath and look back to where I was staring, literally into nothing, he closed the door behind him and stood there, "you alright?" he asked tilting his head to the side to get a better view of me

I started to nod my head, my head slightly bouncing up and down for a bit longer than it should, "yeah I'm alright" I said softly,

he gave me a tight lipped smile and sat down on the floor beside me, "matt told me what happened" he said staring ahead as well

I hold my breathe for a few seconds and let it out,
I didn't say anything, what was I supposed to say to that, chris turns his head to look at me, "he feels like shit"

the sentence that just spilled out his mouth made me turn my head to him instantly, "why the fuck does he feel like shit?" I asked confused, because for real? why does he feel like shit? I'm the one who's supposed to feel like shit, I'm the one who put myself in that position, not him,

chris sighed and turned his head away from me, staring straight on again, I do the same, we're both sitting in silence now,

"I mean he told me everything, maybe go try talk to him", I shut my eyes closed, not knowing what to say again,

he placed his hand on the floor to help himself get up, he wiped his hands against his sweatpants,
"good night jade" he said before walking back into the hotel

it's getting late now, it's nearly twelve am and I'm still sitting here, I try gather my thoughts together, do I just go back inside and act like nothing happened, or do I go back inside and immediately start talking about what happened. I feel like whatever I do, the outcome won't be good,

I start slightly hitting my head against the wall because I hate the situation I put myself in, we were finally talking like two normal human beings until I made things awkward,

I push myself up and walk inside the hotel, i walk towards the elevator, I press the button to bring me up to the fourth floor, my hands are so sweaty that my finger left an imprint on the button,

I started swinging my arms a bit, uncomfortable by silence in the elevator, but you know what would be more uncomfortable? walking into my hotel room

I'm standing in front of the door just staring at it,
I lift my hand up to open it but I pull it back almost straight away, I tilt my head back and groan, what the fuck am I doing? Honestly. I start biting my nails while pacing in front of the door, he's probably asleep,

I stop pacing and freeze when the realisation hit me, if that mother fuckers asleep then I'm just gonna have to get into bed with him and act like it's a normal thing,

I start pacing again,

after pacing for nearly ten minutes I decide to sit down, I sit down with my back to the door, if I walk in there it's going to be so awkward for fuck sake,

I place my hands on my face and I start to dramatically rub my face, trying to get my shit together

while so, the door opens and I nearly fall to the floor, but something stopped me, I turn around while still seated and see that it was matts legs that stopped me from falling, I tilt my head back to look up at him and he's just staring at me in shock, he definitely didn't expect me to be right outside the door by the look on his face