Trust Me Darling

4. THE ENGAGEMENT

After putting up a fight with myself, I got ready for the said engagement. And right now all of us are at the venue of the occasion. Everyone is discussing something or the other. Meanwhile, I'm trying to calm myself down from this nervous feeling that I feel every time I go into public. You know the 'introvert things'. I was making my way to the area where the event takes place. But it was not at all pleasant as I was constantly feeling overwhelmed with quite a lot of people talking to me. I do not even recognize more than half of them and they come to me and ask me things like, "Hello Yamini, do you remember me? I'm your aunt" I don't even know that you exist, you woman. And, "Do you always need a wheelchair dear?" No, I need it only when I have to walk because I'm lazy. "Hello Dear, you are so good-looking, but only if you could walk normally like others". Right, only if god had given you a brain. "Hi Yamini, are you studying or working? Or else, why don't you do some business course?" First you mind your own business. "Are you not eating well dear? You've become so thin. You have to keep yourself healthy Yamini". And you have to keep your mouth shut.

These are the kind of questions and people that pisses me off like nothing else. I wish the earth would swallow me here and now. But to my bad luck, I cannot answer them how I think in my head. But instead, I smile at them and answer politely, or leave it to my mom to deal with. After meeting the people that are getting engaged, and deciding that I'd had enough torture, I wheeled myself to a quiet and lonely corner table in the venue without caring about anyone anymore. Once I got settled there, I pulled my phone out and buried my head in it to keep myself occupied and away from everyone.

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(At my family's table which is far from mine...)

"Hello. How are you?" the groom's mother greeted our family. "These are my brother's kids. I wanted to introduce them to you as they were abroad the last time we met" and began the introduction. "This is my brother's younger child, Nithya. She is currently pursuing medicine". Nithya greeted everyone. "And this is Chandu, I mean Chandrahas, my brother's older child". Chandu flashed his ever-charming smile and greeted everyone politely. "He had recently done his MBA in London. And now he's looking after the family business". They continued exchanging pleasantries with each other. "I forgot, where is Yamini? I cannot see her anywhere. Did she even come here?".

"Yamini! Yes, that's her name. Yes!" Chandu thought and felt surprised. "No Akka she came, but I don't know where she is sitting" my mother answered. "Yamini always stays separate", one of my aunts said sarcastically. "Is it the same Yamini that I want her to be or someone completely different?" Chandu began to wonder. "Akka is sitting at the table near the pond area. She had to attend a work call", my brother backed me. "At a table near the pond area. Ok, I have to go there right now", and slowly Chandu slipped away from the group, unnoticed by anyone, and began his search.

Chandu reached the pond area and searched a few tables. Then his gaze fell on a table at the very far end, almost out of reach of the lights flashing above. There sits a woman in a wheelchair wearing a beautiful dress. Chandu immediately smiled when he saw the wheelchair. But he could not see her face properly from where he was standing. So he went to the other side to have a look at her face. After standing right in front of the table, he could see the face of the woman he had been waiting to see. He could not believe that she was there in front of him for real. All these days, he was wishing to see her again, to talk to her, to know her better. But now, as he finally saw her again, he was stunned with excitement.  Looking at her, his eyes are shining brighter than the moonlight or any other star in the entire galaxy.

He then closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths. After he could finally cool down his nerves from the intense feeling, he went further closer to the table. But she could not see him as her eyes were closed. She also seemed like she was trying very hard to calm her nerves, just like he had to, but in a different way. After observing her for a few more moments, he finally spoke....
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After I got settled at the far end table, I pulled my phone out to keep myself occupied (also to seem like I was doing something important) and to keep away from others. This feels nice. To be away from everyone. After a while, I looked around and saw that everyone was talking, laughing, and in the company of someone else. It looked like I was alone on the one side and the entire world was on the other side. Why only I am like this? "Because you deserve no one. They are happy because they are away from you". My mind started its banter again, and I started to feel uneasy.

A few flashbacks from the past where I was made to feel unwanted had started to play in my head. I kept shaking my head every few seconds as if that would clear my mind from these nuisances. A sudden urge to shout at the top of my lungs is increasing. "Okay, please stop now, would you?" I said to myself in a low and shaky voice. My breathing was now a bit faster and I began to shake my legs under the table. Even tears have started to threaten to fall. So I closed my eyes and tried to bring myself back to normalcy. But after a while, someone invaded my lone time and said...

"Hello, Yamini". And I opened my eyes to see a tall man smiling at me sweetly.
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