Total Drama Action (Lewis McLean)

One Million Bucks, B.C.

[for religious reasons, i need to clarify in the show, he pronounces it like 'hay-zeus', not 'gee-sus']

"I think I can." Heather said, glaring through the window at the boys' trailer. "Actually, wait a second. Since we were talking about Courtney just before, where even is she?" I asked, looking around. "Dunno, don't care. I'm just glad she ain't here." Leshawna said, looking into the mirror again. Heather rolled her eyes, before proceeding to nearly pull Lindsay's entire head of hair off, but even when Lindsay was screaming in pain, Heather continue to pull down on the brush.

It was getting around to the point even I was uncomfortable with it. "OWW!" Luckily, though, it ended sooner rather than later. "Got the knot!" Heather happily announced, but what she held up was an entire clump of blonde hair. Not a knot. 

"Hey, girls!" Courtney burst through the door, and everyone turned her way, frowning. Except me, but I wasn't smiling, either. "Um, isn't anyone glad to see me?" She questioned, raising a brow. Heather approached her, acting... weirder than normal. "Great to have your hair... uh- Here! Here! It's- It's great to have you here, Courtney." Out of nowhere, a really loud foghorn rang out through the entire movie lot.

All the girls were pretty shocked to hear it, despite knowing what Chris was like. "Uh, what was that!?" Leshawna asked, causing me to shrug. "The start to this challenge. What do you think?"

*

All the teams, including me, gathered where we were supposed to be, and even though I wasn't competing on the show, I stuck with the Gaffers. I wasn't so pleased to discover that Chris was wearing quite a... 'revealing' outfit. "Talk about your fashion faux-pass..." Heather said, looking him up and down with a frown. "Oh, no. Is that boy wearin' a loincloth?" Leshawna questioned in shock. "Like it?" He asked, which was answered by Duncan bursting out in laughter. "Ahahaha! Oh, it hurts! A lot!"

Chris wasn't happy with that response. "You think that hurts? Wait 'til you hear today's challenges! Now... let's get started!" We couldn't get started. Courtney cleared her throat, and raised a brow at Chris. I knew that she was referencing the legalities that came with the lawsuit I'd been told about. "...As soon as I take care of a few formalities. Thanks to Courtney's lawsuit, she'll be playing by a different set of rules!" He looked pretty ticked off, for a guy that changed the rules as he went along, anyway.

"You said there are no rules!" Duncan argued, raising a brow. Courtney smiled, satisfied that she was finally being recognized. "There are, when you have a good lawyer." "Chef, let's get this over with." Chef walked over, and handed Chris a book, before walking away. Chris cleared his throat, and began to read through the rule book. "Ahem! Rule 1. Notwithstanding that contestants are not permitted contact with the outside world, the constants hereafter referred to as 'Courtney'... may retain a person digital assistant, a.k.a, her PDA."

Beth didn't like that. "WHAT!? That's so not fair! I'm the one with the boyfriend!" She complained, but Chris did not have the energy to deal with it. "Care to take that up with our legal department, Beth? Huh?" She gasped at the realization that Chef was leading the show's legal department. "Didn't think so. Rule 2. Whereas contestants shall continue to receive allocated meals provided by Chef Hatchet, Courtney shall be entitled to a gourmet dining experience with parties consisting of producers and myself, as applicable. I hope you like lobster!"

Almost immediately, every single member of both teams began to argue with Courtney, and they protested that it wasn't fair how she was getting all of these advantages. To be honest with you, I didn't find it fair either, so I was also protesting, despite not even competing in this whole thing.

I found it unfair that my friends weren't getting them, too.

"Let's see your lawyers get you out of this one!" Chris exclaimed, savouring the drama. Courtney tried to save herself. "What? I'm still sleeping in the girls' trailer!" But... she didn't get far. There was a rule tied into that, too. "Where she will have a pure goose-down pillow, extra-lofty comforter, and 700 thread-count sheets. Oh! And, I can't forget, her own... private... bathroom." In that instant, everybody started getting actually angry over the unfair advantages she was getting.