she's just a kid || the 100

50 || new life

It seemed like a good idea overall. It would help with the overpopulation problem, meaning less work for the Hydro Farm to sustain us for the next three years. As the Grounders were used to constantly fighting, and it made them not just bored, but bloodthirsty with life in the bunker, it was a solution to their bloodlust. Not only that, but in a crazy way, it really bought Wonkru together. It made everyone realise that it was not every clan or every man for themselves down here, but One Clan. Wonkru. Those who faced their fates in the pit were the only enemies we had to face.

In a twisted way, things since the fighting pits started have been almost... good. Peaceful, weirdly. Our council meetings have dwindled to weekly, and so have the fighting pits. Thankfully, we only get enough offenders for one fight a week, usually consisting of between 4 and 12 people.

After completely giving up on the idea of getting any more sleep without being burdened with nightmares, I decided to get ready for the day and head to my office to review the new dorm arrangements that were to be assigned next week. Those who had private dorms stayed the same, meanwhile we switched up everyone else's dorms every six months. The idea worked relatively well, since some people would get sick of each other after a little while. Though, there were an abundance of requests that had been sent in from the public regarding wanting to stay with particular people or wanting to avoid being roomed with specific people.

I flicked through the applications, only some of which were reasonable, meanwhile others were ridiculous things like 'I will not share a room with an Azgeda heathen' and 'PLEASE PUT ME WITH SKAIRIPA SHE IS SO AMAZING' and tried to find reason in what went on in these people's minds. I found it really difficult to, in all honesty. I mean, I'm only 10 myself, and I have more common sense than some of the grown adults in this bunker.

I turned 10 about two weeks ago, and it was my third birthday spent in the bunker, and also my third birthday without Bellamy, which sucked, to say the least. I listened to yet another message that he had recorded, like he's done for every birthday. He must have just recorded five messages, one for every birthday I was gonna have to spend without him. They were the only thing I looked forward to about my birthday every year. 

I had also started writing Bellamy letters. I knew that I could never send them, and he'd probably never read them, but they made me feel a lot closer to him. I tried to write one a week, but sometimes it ended up being more, just whenever I was feeling down and needed my dad. It still feels a little surreal that we consider each other father and daughter, even though we aren't gonna see each other for who-knows how long. Well, five years, hopefully, but we don't know for sure.

As I flicked through the requests, sorting them into a 'maybe' pile and throwing the rest in the trash, I tried to block out the tiny voices in the back of my head. They were like screams, but really far away. Sheidheda's doing, no doubt. I didn't want to tell Gaia. Not yet, at least.  She has been really busy lately, being one of two teachers in the entire bunker. She taught combat and Grounder Knowledge, meanwhile the other teacher taught the theory subjects, like Math, Chemistry and Earth Skills.

Occasionally, when there is no extra work for me, I like to join in on the classes and feel like I'm actually a normal kid for once, but then I am unfortunately reminded that I am in fact, not a normal kid when no more than 15 minutes in to trying to learn, I would be interrupted by a guard walking in saying something along the lines of, 'Pardon me, Heda. You are needed by literally everyone because this underground society full of capable adults simply cannot manage to sort out anything without you, a murderer child with weird blood.'

Or something like that.

I still like to keep my mind exercised, though. I have this thing called an eidetic memory, I've found out from Jackson, which is part of the reason why I've always been insanely smart for my age. I still read every chance I get, a hobby I don't think I'll ever lose. I've read Metamorphosis, the book Octavia gave me for my birthday, about 20 times in the last two years. There really aren't many books down here, which is kind of dissapointing, but I don't mind re-reading books.