Double Sided Tracks

when I shipwrecked I thought of you

The last thing he understood was Bono in his ears asking if he was okay. No, Bono, I spun and nose deep in the barrier. But he couldn't answer anything, there was a lot of noises, the rattling of the multi million dollars piece of machinery that he just wrecked, the crowds, his own heart beats, Bono and Toto on the radio asking him questions he doesn't understand, the beeping from the small screen on his steering wheel.

He couldn't focus, until there's some noises in his head, Roscoe's pitter patters, the sound of his sim, the fizzles of champagne on podiums, and—

Nora.

Her giggles, "you're okay! You're okay Sir Lewis hamilton!" she said in a teasing tone, this was when she had convinced him to try the spicy tofu– that was too spicy for his liking so he was all coughing and pouty.

"Oh baby," she had said teasingly that day. Oh baby, you're okay! You're okay Sir Lewis hamilton!

Then it's nothing.

He woke up with a massive headache, but a familiar one. A concussion, then. Well, that was a bit dramatic, he thought. Then he realised his left hand was falling asleep and there's a weight on it, so he tilted his head to the left to see a familiar lump.

Nora.

Is this not a concussion? Did he.. Did he die? Fuck, did this sport finally managed to kill him? Lewis slowly moved his right hand, touching her head. She's sleeping face down, face comfortably nestled on the back of his hand.

She jostled, quickly sitting up from her previous position. She lets out a breath when she realised it was Lewis who woken her up. "Lewis.." she whispered. "You're okay." she said, matter of factly.

You're okay! You're okay Sir Lewis hamilton!

"You have a concussion," she started, sitting straight now. He missed the warmth over his hand. "And some bruises, but you're okay." she added, "your pain killer knocked you out, basically." she added. "Do you want me to call someone?" she asked, ready to get up.

Lewis shook his head quickly, so he's not dead, Nora is actually in front of him and talking to him. "No, I– please stay," he said. There are so many things I want to tell you, there's so many things I need to say.

"Lewis.." she whispered, and Lewis nodded quickly, wincing when it gave him a slight dizzy spell. But, he gets it, he gets it. He understood. He had hurt her, and not just once– and maybe he has no right asking her to stay. But he's selfish, they've established this.

Ignoring how dry his throat is, "I need to talk to you– I'm– I'm sorry. I really–" there's not enough words to describe how terribly sorry I am, there aren't enough words to show that I actually mean it.

Nora handed him a glass of water, helping him. I don't deserve you and I know this– but, please. Is all he wanted to scream and shout, watching her holding the glass making sure Lewis took sips of the water. He could see her soft wrist decorated with the bracelets, although the ones he bought her are not wrapped around her wrist anymore.

"Nora please," he said, voice clearer this time. He's not above begging. She had let him see her in the most broken and most vulnerable state, the least he can return is his most vulnerable self. Begging for forgiveness. "I didn't mean any of it, I was stupid. I was angry– and I know I had no right to be angry, but I was." he said.

Nora shakes her head, like she's trying to block his voice out. "Lewis come on, we really shouldn't talk– you're hurt. You've got a concussion." she said.

"You said I'm fine," he said firmly, and continued, "if not now then, when?"

Nora took a deep breath, she looked tired, he noticed just now. Her eyes are slightly puffy, her white shirt is slightly crumpled, he could see she's been biting her nails. "Then, never." she said softly, face trying to remain neutral though he could see the hurt.