Across The Paper

Part 15: Shatter Me Completely

She watched me, opening her mouth in silent ecstasy, her eyes shut in an instant. "Strange how complicated we can make things just to avoid showing what we feel."

I knew what she was saying was true. But... how can we avoid showing what we feel when we don't really understand the feeling at all?

That didn't make any sense.

All I knew, was that every questioning of my frustrating mindset went insanely silent once I had her lips against mine.

I tucked on her neck, begging with my eyes for her to lean in once again. She was just a few centimetres away from my lips, and as she was about to pull me in, I heard, and I felt, a hard knocking against the door, right behind my back.

We broke from each other, looking with wide doe eyes. We were frozen for a few more seconds just like that, but the knock was louder this time.

I glanced at her for the last time before turning to the door, knowing it surely wouldn't be Gahyeon... for so many reasons.

And I was right. It was my mother standing right by the door, confused as to why her daughter needed this much time to open the door. I was actually so glad and relieved that mom still thinks she should knock before entering the room, even if it's her daughter's one.

I can't even manage to think about what would happen if she just attempted to open the door, finding Siyeon pressing me against it.

"Mom!"

"Bora,"

"Miss Kim-"

"...Siyeon?"

Certainly, I saw this go better in my head.

Mom looked between us curiously, before her eyes stopped on me, "I wanted to inform you that I need someone to send back to Parks mansion, I forgot my gloves." She said, surprisingly not asking about the reason of Siyeon being in my room, or about the fact that our faces looked quite a lot frightened. "But I couldn't find Yubin, nor Gahyeon, for that matter. Do you perhaps have any idea about their whereabouts?"

I cleared my throat, visibly flustered by the situation. "No, but you can send any of the guys, Mom, I believe they finished working in the fields."

"I can go, ma'am." Siyeon interrupted, taking a step in front. My mom took her gaze to her, lingering on her face with an expression that was fully unknown to me. Which felt terrifying. I usually know what she thinks.

This was the first exception.

"No, it's alright," My mom said in the end, "I'll just send one of the boys, just as Bora suggested. Thank you for the offer, though." She smiled, taking her eyes to me once again. I felt Siyeon falter, taking a step in front of me.

"I better get going, my shift is done already." She looked at me one last time, giving me a small smile on the corner of her lips before walking away.

I felt every bit of my calmness leave along with her steps, now that I was left alone with my mother. And I actually don't know why it affected me this much; most of the time I'm alone with her, but this felt different. I was just kissing someone, a girl, while pressed against the door, and... I would not want to know the reaction of my mom after knowing that information.

Surprisingly, though fortunately, she just smiled at me and told me she had something to do down in the kitchen, before closing the door in front of me and leaving, along with the clicks of her heels as she disappeared in the distance.