Til The Bitter End | Alec Lightwood

29

"Clary," I put my hand on her shoulder. "It's all good relax. It's over."

"I know, but I shouldn't have—."

"Clary—."

"I didn't choose you and I want you to know that I regret that decision," She interrupted me. I squeezed her shoulder tightly. "If you wouldn't have come back, I don't know how I would have been able to live with myself."

"Claire, I'm not angry. Jace was stabbed through the heart. He had less time than me. Also, you love him," I cupped her cheek. "Relax. It's over. Let's not dwell on it please." 

"I love you." 

"I love you too."

To be honest, in that situation, I didn't know what I would have done either. I didn't know exactly what she was talking about, but if the roles were reversed. I wouldn't be able to move from Alec's side even if he was dead. I wouldn't be able to let him go.

***

"It wasn't you."

I choked on the water as I tried to pull myself free. A hand grabbed my ankle yanking me back into the water. 

"She didn't choose you! This goes against natural law, Lena!"

"I know," I sobbed. "Please. Please!"

"Lynn, you were not chosen. You have been through too much." 

His voice made my ears ring. I tried to cover them, but the moment my hands slipped from the rocks. He dragged me further into the water. My hands cut deep into the bone as I clawed for my life.

"Please! Don't! I can't leave!" I cried.

My voice was cut off by the water filling my lungs. I tried to kick and scream. I tried to swim to the surface, but something was pulling me deeper and deeper. The fear of death was just below the surface as I fought. 

"Ahh!" I screamed trying to free myself from his grasp, but he wouldn't let go.

"You were not chosen!"

"Lena!"

I sat up quickly gasping as I slid off the bed moving to the corner. My hands clutched my chest as I looked around the bedroom. Alec was staring at me. His body was half up already. He was trying to wake me.

"Lena?" Alec slowly got up from the bed. "It was a dream." My breathing was erratic as I looked around. There was no lake. I was in the Institute.

"It wasn't me," I muttered. "I wasn't chosen."

"Linny, it was a nightmare. You're okay," Alec reached for me, but I shook my head as I touched my chest and then his. His heartbeat was slower than mine.

"It hurts," I said. He pulled me close to his chest. "I wasn't chosen. He won't let go."

"Who Lena?" He asked.

"Raziel, he won't let go," I whispered as I locked my arms around his neck. "He—he won't—."

"Breath Lena." I felt his heartbeat just below my hand. Mine slowed until it matched his. I was safe. I was home.

"I was scared Alec, I didn't want to die," I admitted. Alec pulled me closer to him. The two of us refused to loosen our grips.

***

I had my rune ceremony first. Clary and I had gone to Idris to get our official Shadow Hunter rune. We would officially be out of training. Which I thought was quite comical, but didn't question it. Imogen gave me my tattoo and I stepped back with the others while Clary came forward.