Til The Bitter End | Alec Lightwood

19

"Lena," Luke muttered. I leaned back from Clary kneeling next to his cot. He took my hand. "We owe you our lives." 

"I didn't save them all," I shook my head. "You don't owe me anything."

"We do," Luke groaned as he tried to sit up. "We do. We owe you everything and more for your sacrifice."

"Is it really a sacrifice if I'm alive?" I asked. 

"I'm so glad you're not dead. You deserve better than that," Luke breathed. I squeezed his hand as I stood up.

"Where is Isabelle?" I asked the two of them, but they shook their heads.

"I haven't seen her yet," Clary shrugged. 

I didn't feel her die. I took off running as I moved past several other shadow hunters throwing bodies to the sides.

"Lightwoods!" I screamed as I moved into the main room. "Isabelle and Alec Lightwood!" 

Everyone looked at me like I was insane. I felt insane. They should be around here somewhere. They had to be. They were okay, right?

"Lilly!" Magnus. I turned seeing Magnus coming down the stairs. He had tears on his face. I moved to him throwing my arms around him. "I thought you were—."

"I was," I said. 

He let out a long breath. He pressed his head against mine as he held the back of my head. The hugs felt lighter and heavier than they ever had. They were so full of emotion.

"We have to get you upstairs," Magnus grabbed my arm. 

We ran through the halls. I threw the door open to the room and saw Izzy, Alec, and Jace around the room. Tears on their faces.

"This is something I never thought I would see," I smiled as the door cracked against the wood panelling behind me. 

Isabelle was the first one up. I couldn't read her. She was happy, sad, pissed, all at once. It was terrifying. 

"If you hit me, I will accept that." She pulled me into a hug.

"I hate you," She said.

"I love you too," I smiled as she held me. Her body shook as she cried.

"I felt you die, I felt you leave." She breathed.

"I know, I know, I'm so sorry."

"I saw you disappear," Jace stood up. He came forward. The closer he got the more I could see his red eyes. He activated the soul sword and I destroyed it. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay, you don't have to apologize," He hugged me. "I would have had to do it either way." 

"Stop trying to sacrifice yourself," He glared at me. I laughed a little.

"I don't think I have anything left to sacrifice," I admitted. He pulled me into another quick hug.

"I'm giving you both a few minutes, but only a few," Isabelle smiled. 

Her cheeks still gleaming with tears. The door shut behind me as I saw Alec stand. His expression was still shocked as he stared at me.

"I'm sorry," I whispered. 

He moved to me, his hand reaching for me. I held him as he buried his head in my neck. The both of us just held each other.

"I heard Izzy's screams," He paused as he leaned back. "I knew—when you before—Lena I've never felt this kind of pain before. Ever." He was breathing heavily almost like he was going to go into a panic attack. "You can't. You can't do that again ever. You can't leave me."