Life Under The Rainbow

Chapter Eleven

Judging me

Making me feel so used

Cant you see

That all I

Wanna do is

Get a little wild

Get a little high

Kiss a hundred boys and

Not feel like Im tied to them

If you wanna judge me then

Go and load the gun

Ive done nothing wrong

Im young.

Sam Smith does it for me. They know how to set the mood, and although I have no desire of doing all the things they mention on this song like falling of tables and kissing one hundred boys, Im still young. I also want to live.

I definitely had my share of mistakes when I was young. He says sipping on his glass of wine.

You speak as if you are in your late thirties. We are only four years apart.

Age doesnt determine the number of problems you experience.

Maybe, but its more likely for someone whos been around longer to have more problems. He sat up and he looked ready to debate my answer.

Im going to have to disagree with you on this one. I knew it. There are some people who could be in their fifties, and they dont have any serious problems, no serious depression, just nice life problems, minor things that could be solved within the click of a finger. While I, only at 28, couldve started experiencing life problems at age 7. Compared to that person in their fifties who has only experience a few problems in their lifetime, Ive already experienced quite a few in mine. He didnt really explain it the right way, but I understand what he means. Seems like hes been through hell in his lifetime.

It took a lot for me to be able to smile like I am now. He says absentmindedly. He keeps quiet for a while and when he finally snaps out of it, he looks at me.

Enough about sadness. What movie are we watching? he asked standing up.

I dont know. Im not a movie person. I held out his hand so he could taste my stew.

This is good. Who taught you to cook?

My mother. I said and smiled.

Mrs Zuzile Mfusi. He said.

Shes the love of my life. he closed me in.

I thought you said you dont love women. He joked. I laughed lowly and turned my face away from him. He was doing that thing of looking deep into my soul.

Why cant you look at me? he asked, his breath fanning my face.

You do this thing with your eyes. Its like you look beyond my eyes, like you are seeing my soul, like you know all my secrets.

Do you think I do? he whispered.

Do what? I asked.

Know all your secrets? I smiled and our eyes locked once again. Damn.

My pots are burning. I pushed him away a little and turned to check my stove. He chuckled lowly and moved back. My heart was beating in my ears. I switched off the stove because everything was cooked and ready.

Are you done? I want to show you something. He asked already pulling my hand.

Yes. He led me up the stairs to my room and I started screaming internally.

He closed the door behind me, and he pushed me to lie on the bed. He climbed on top of me.

Relax. He kissed my lips gently and that seemed to help my body relax a bit.

His hands started massaging my whole body while he kissed my lips, and then my neck. He pulled up my t-shirt, up over my head and threw it across the room. His hands ran down my torso, on my stomach, making me quiver. His hands were rough, unlike mine, that were forever soft. He strayed from my lips and went down to plant soft kisses on my torso, down my stomach and stopped at my waistline. He opened his eyes and he looked at me. It looked like he was looking for consent. As skeptical as I was, I nodded. He tugged on the waist band of my shorts and started pulling them down. I lifted my bum and he removed them completely. I was terrified for what he was about to do. His hand wrapped around my member, and I flinched. He started stroking it gently and I slowly felt myself drifting into a state of ecstasy. While I had my eyes closed, falling deeper and deeper into that ecstasy, I felt something warm. Shocked, I opened my eyes, and tried to sit up but he pushed me back down. He had his mouth doing things to me and I moaned out.

Oh Mkhululi! His tongue circled my tip and his hands played with my balls. I wanted to cry.

Dont stop. He didnt. he didnt stop. He went on and on until I had my happy ending, and I shot all my children down his throat.

I was so scared to open my eyes and look at him after the beautiful sin we just committed. He came up to my face and he chuckled when he found my eyes still closed. I opened one.

How was that? he asked with a silly smirk on his face.

Amazing. I replied and covered my eyes. He laughed.

He took off is t-shirt along with his shorts and got in next to me. We cuddled and my heart felt at peace.

You see what Ive just done here, Ive never done that for anyone. He spoke. I looked at him.

What do you mean? I asked confused.

Im a bottom. He just confused me even more than before.

It means I dont do the penetrating; I prefer being penetrated and all my past relationships, its either no oral was done, or my partner would do it to me, only if they wanted to. What I mean is, I dont give head. Well damn. I dont even know what I am.

Its okay not to know what you are. You havent had to many sexual encounters to know. Im willing to give you a chance to decide. The thought of anything going in my anus scares me though, I dont want to lie.

Only time will tell. He said and kissed my cheek.

I just had my first real sexual encounter, and it was with a man, I couldnt be happier than I am now. My life makes sense, or at least this part of it does.

Will you spend the night? I asked, already high on love.

Do you want me to?

With every fiber of my being.

He pulled me closer, and I pressed my lips on his before laying my big head on his chest.