Invisible String [T.S-E.S BOOK ONE]

26

October 4th, 2013

Eleanor woke up the next morning much later than normal. It was quickly becoming a habit for her to sleep in and she really didn't know how to feel about that. Especially when the bed next to her was cold.

"What the-" she asked herself, feeling around next to her.

Taylor had definitely fallen asleep on her chest. Had she left early? Did she really not love Eleanor anymore now that she knew her secret? Did she really leave her in the middle of the night? She—

Meow!

Meredith jumped on top of Eleanor, startling her enough to fully wake her up.

"Fucking hell." The athlete laughed, running her fingers through the cat's gray and white fur. "At least you still love me, Mere." She snuggled close to the cat.

Meredith was less than enthused, but somehow understood that Eleanor needed her.

"Damn, she hates it when I try to give her attention."

Eleanor's head snapped towards the bedroom door. Taylor was standing there, holding a tray of breakfast.

The athlete's heart soared. She hadn't left. She still loved her.

"Tay!" Eleanor gasped out, sitting up in bed, letting Meredith jump away from her. "I thought you left."

"My own apartment?" Taylor giggled, finally entering the room. "Happy birthday baby."

The singer sat in bed next to her player, passing over a plate of the food that she had made her. She felt horrible that she didn't feel hungry at all. The guilt was still eating away at her.

"Fuck." Eleanor sighed, a tear falling down her cheek. "Fuck, I'm so sorry."

Taylor's heart clenched as she watched Eleanor slowly break down in front of her. She was thankful for the transparency, but it was painful to watch her suffer.

For the first time in months, Eleanor was sober, but her body was rejecting it. She was itching. She was guilty. And Taylor made her breakfast.

"I don't deserve you." Eleanor finally admitted.

Taylor took the plates away, putting them on the dresser and quickly returning to bed to take Eleanor into her arms. The athlete sobbed, shaking in the arms of her lover. Months of lying and pent up fear. Fear of being a failure. Fear of losing Taylor. Fear of being her mother. It all came out.

"Nell, I love you no matter what. You deserve me and I deserve you. No amount of drugs or secrets can change that baby. I just need you to be honest with me." The blonde rubbed her back.

Eleanor nodded, pulling away from her girlfriend. Maybe it was finally time to lay it all out there. Tell all the secrets that she didn't want to keep anymore. Secrets that only her family knew.

If Taylor wasn't leaving, she was family now.

"Do you really want me to be honest?" She asked, giving her girl a final out.

Taylor was almost shocked at the sudden willingness to offer information on her life. It had been an uphill battle to get there and all she wanted was to let her talk and just sit there and listen.

She reached a hand up and cupped Eleanor's face, looking into her deep green, tear filled eyes. "I want to know everything there is to know about you."

The athlete wasn't sure if she should go that far. She'd never gone that far with anyone. But this was Taylor, the girl she fell in love with almost four years ago and the girl she'd spent the last seven months giving all of her energy too.