Chapter 18

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Teaching me magic in the quiet library, the aroma of books and tea fresh in the room.

Spending time in my bedroom with the cold spells she cast during the hot summer days.

Watching with joy and love as I cast my first spell successfully.

Teaching me about all the different animals in the nine realms.

Trying to explain to me that all monsters have stories, even the Jötun...

"The future hasn't be kind to you, has it?" She asks, cupping Thor's chin in her palm.

Oh, if only you knew.

"I didn't say I was from the future," Thor stutters while Mother just chuckles, her voice warm like honey.

"I was raised by witches, boy," she smells of lavender, her golden curls falling gracefully around her shoulders, "I see with more than just eyes, you know that,"

Thor and I visiting the woods where Mother grew up. The sound of birds and a bubbling stream fresh in my mind.

Thor holds back a sob, "Y-yes I'm totally from the future," he agrees.

"Yes, you are, honey,"

Oh how I've missed you.

"I really need to talk to you," he gasps, grasping onto her forearms.

My heart sinks.

"We can talk,"

Fylgjur.

Then they pull each other into a hug, Mother rubbing his back as they rock back and forth. Holding onto each other for infinite.

A fly on the wall.

Forever a witness.

I cannot even tell my own mother I'm sorry.

That I loved her.

I watch as Thor and Frigga sit down, and he explains everything that hapened.

You really are the worst brother.

The Tesseract? Or your brothers head?

What more could I lose?

He speaks with such sorrow that it pains me, as if an invisible hand has reached into my chest and twisted and crumpled my heart.

I just watch Frigga, watch her calming demeanor. Her smile that could light up the whole room, the grace her words and movement. The love that she showers upon Thor.

It's my fault she's gone.

"Now, you're no idiot," Frigga reassures him, walking over, "You're here, aren't you? Seeking council from the wisest person in Asgard?"

Oh, how she always knew what to say.

"I am, yes," Thor says, sipping a drink that I can't tell has alcohol or not.

Mother smiles, "Idiot, no. A failure? Absolutely,"

You are nothing, Jötun scum.

"That's a little bit harsh," Thor murmurs, sloshing the liquid around in his cup.

You deserve to rot in chains.

Frigga ignores him, simply continuing on, "Do you know what that makes you?"

A disappoint-

"Just like everyone else," She soothes, sitting down next to Thor, tracing her fingers through his matted hair.

Mother finding me in the woods, after shapeshifting into a horse and unable to shift back. A stallion bolts away from the Queen. Comforting me, broken and crying in my youth.

"I'm not supposed to be like everyone else, am I?"

Liesmith, Silvertongue, Trickster God.

Frigga only hums in thought, the love and passion in her eyes, "Everyone fails at who they're supposed to be, Thor,"

I could've done it, Father. For you, for all of us.

"The measure of a person, of a hero-"

I was never allowed the chance to be the hero. Overshadowed by the golden son of Odin.

"-is how well they succeed at being who they are,"

Always so perceptive of everyone but yourself.

Maybe there's still good in you.

Thor sniffs, leaning into Frigga's touch, "I've really missed you, Mom,"

Frigga summoning an illusion to my cell, noticing my own.

"Please, Loki, you don't have to hide from me,"

Taking down the illusion, revealing my broken soul, the blood dripping from my wrists, my head hidden in my legs, curled into a ball. A dagger tossed to the side.

She holds me as I sob in her arms.

God of Misunderstood Pain.

I watch as they hug, wishing for her warm embrace once more.

And my heart can't help but mourn.

For the fact that they look happier without me.

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