you're on your own, kid

Chapter 8 - An Olympic Shitshow

I stood with Viv in the middle of the pitch, and we looked over to see Ingrid and Jill sitting beside each other on the bench. There was something so soft between them, but I couldn't quite describe it. It was unsettling but also calming, all at the same time. They were both so comfortable in themselves, that it was easy to find that peace in someone else as well. They knew who they were. They didn't need to like someone else to prove it to themselves.

"I swear, those two, are eye fucking each other at the moment," I said to Viv, who laughed in response.

"Oh for sure."

"Has she said much to you about her?"

"Not much, just that she thinks she likes her."

"Thinks? Are we seeing the same thing at the moment?" Viv chuckled, wrapping her arm around my shoulders, and walking us both back inside.

"Yes, but we know what Jill's like. She's stubborn. Won't admit something like that."

"I've never heard you say anything more true."

Over the next few weeks, we continued to train ready to head across to Japan. I had a few messages from Lena, but I kept forgetting to reply.

Lena: I'm sorry about what happened.

Lena: Bakker?

Lena: hm where are you?

Lena: I don't like being left on read Mila!

I chuckled at the messages knowing I needed to call my friend before things turned to shreds.

"Hey," I said into the phone, the day before we were to head to Tokyo.

"Well, rather late than never," Lena laughed.

"Sorry. I've been a bit preoccupied."

"How are you?"

"I'm okay. How are you?"

"I'm okay."

"Are we okay?"

"Why wouldn't we be?" It wasn't as if I was scared, to be honest with her it was more that I was scared about what was going to change. Would anything change? I didn't know.

"What are your plans for the next few weeks?" I soon asked her.

"Not much. Waiting for my friends to get back." I chuckled softly.

"It's just me and Becks that are gone," I laughed.

"Yeah, you're my friend though." There was something soft there. I wasn't sure what it was. But it wasn't surface level. It was deeper.

"I guess I am."

"You guess?"

"I don't know, Lena!"

"Why'd you call me Obi, the other week?"

"That's your name."

"Yeah. It is."

"And I'm just your friend, too." I put too much emphasis on the just. I knew I did. Lena didn't say anything for a while, and just as I was about to speak, Jill came in. "I've gotta go, Lena. I'll talk to you later, yeah?"

"Uh okay. Bye, Mila."

"Bye."

Jill walked in, looking confused, but soon jumped on my bed.

"I love her," Jill said, looking up at the ceiling.

"Oh god, you're smitten."

"Maybe I am."

"Maybe? Girl, you are so smitten."

"Yes, okay. What do I do?" Jill asked.

"Well, isn't it perfect? You are coming to Wolfsburg, and she is at Wolfsburg. It'll all work out." Jill stared at me, her eyes looking at mine as if there was something I didn't know.

"She hasn't told you?" Jill asked.

"Told me what?"

"You should talk to Ingrid."

"What about?" I questioned.

"It's not my place.

"Jill..."

"Just, call her. She'll tell you."

Jill walked out, and I grabbed my phone which I nearly threw on the ground after hanging up with Lena, needing to call my friend. My closet friend from Wolfsburg. Ingrid was the one who welcomed me in with open arms when I arrived. I was the youngest in the squad, with no idea what to do or who I was going to become. She helped me settle myself, and find my place in the team. And without her or Frido, I don't know if I would've made it past the first week, let alone the first two years.