"What Happened to The Old You?" "He Died."

"What Happened to The Old You?" "He Died."

My friends keep asking what happened to the old you

he died a long time ago I'm not the person you once knew

there's a black hole where my heart should be

surrounded by a pool of tar instead of a blue sea

"you used to be nice, used to be kind"

you should have kept Johnny cash's advice in mind

Trust gets you killed love gets you hurt being real get you hated

I'm not the person you once knew who acted as if castrated

the old me would just sat back and then not say a word

now I speak my mind, people are appalled thinking I'm absurd

I don't like to lie not anymore

if I can't be real with you I think I'll just walk out the door

I've told them what happened till I was blue in the face

they never remember why I quit the race

I don't even bother explaining why it happened

I'm just glad it's over and that I'm not a hazbin

I don't say a word I don't speak my mind

unless it's around people my can trust in time

the wise advice of my opinion never mattered

you think I'm crazy torn and tattered

they don't understand that I've been where they are

broken down in a room, my heart full of scars

although one of them has never experienced heartbreak

The other one knows what it feels like to have it speared on a stake

the other is blind and doesn't see what I see

that the girl he's with is the one that shouldn't be

They pry and they nag when I see them

wondering when I'm gonna get back in the saddle again

yes it's been four years and the lesson has been learned

my heart still hurts for a girl who I once yearned

I haven't found anyone in this generation that seems like they're worth it

they're not worried about their hearts and the people who have hurt it

You're lust makes you blind with no sense of clarity

You need to look past the sex and learn to the judge them fairly

The sex isn't gonna pay the bills nor parent your kids

So when it's time to give birth it better be his

because without trust there is no love and no love without trust

without those two things your foundation will rust

with trust comes loyalty hopefully until the end

because some bridges that are burned you cannot rebuild or mend

I can burn many bridges just being myself

I don't even need to ask for whiskey for help

I don't feel guilt about the bridges that are gone

past should stay in the past because of the beginning of a day starts a new dawn

some people are just too different to handle who you are

sometimes it's just best to be friends from afar

occasionally in small doses not for a long time

conversations turned to arguments and can burn bridges and cross lines

I learned to be myself without criticism or fear

Familiar with my friends even though they live near

if I were to die I wouldn't say a fucking thing

Because then you'd only care now at my bells last ring

I tried to make time for you I tried to make plans

when you choose other people with whom you choose to shake hands

others who I do not condone who they are and what they do

I just watched from the far and take in the view

I've been nothing but loyal I've been there when I'm need it to be

why is it so hard for you to be there for me

it shows what my value is and it shows me my worth

even though the end of the day my only value matters to God above the earth

I guess that's all loyalty buys you being tossed to the side

When your good deeds didn't matter as if you weren't even alive

I'm rough around the edges yes I know it's true

what even 100 proof whiskey takes some getting used to

You may think you know me but you only see what I show

I only show the real me the ones whom I truly know

my trust is hard earned and so is my approval

when it comes to giving trust you should be more frugal

I didn't choose to be this way it wasn't my decision

It was the people around me that caused this division

between my heart and my brain calculating and cold

just remember it was your actions that created the mold

so the next time you ask me why I am the way I am

reflect on what you've done for me and whether I should give a damn

Because even a wolf remembers the sound of a gun

The next person who hurts me but doesn't kill me should start learning to run

for the next time it happens I won't be so kind

And if you can't see that then holy shit you'reblind