a/n: LARGE mention of SA. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE DONT READ IF YOU ARE SENSETIVE. I KNOW IVE SAID IT 100 time but please, YOUR MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS!
There was screams
pain
cries
All 7 year old Celia wanted was to die right then and there. Everything was burning, she felt like she was on fire. Stuck and strapped down on a table is where she was.
Tears ran down her face as she sobbed. She wanted to thrash around, and kick her legs but she was stuck. "Stop!" She screamed before her face was slapped, leaving a large red mark. "Please, stop, I'm sorry. I'm sorry it won't happen again, I'll be good." She sobbed as her straps were tightened on her body.
"Put the sense back into her, men."
They were allowed to do whatever they pleased to the 7 year old.
Up shot a 14 year old. She gasped and brought her knees to her chest. She was on her bedroom floor, and her blanket was down to her ankles. The teenager took a deep breath as she looked around. her breaths were shaky as she desperately tried to get air out.
She wanted the larger arms to wrap around her, whisper that it'd be ok. But they weren't there. That's all she wanted, comfort from her dad.
She inhaled shakily as tears filled her eyes. She quickly wiped them away as she put her head on her knees. "Bucky." She whispered, asking for her father. She looked around, then remembering where she was.
She was no longer 9-10 years old and sleeping inside of a closet. Bucky wasn't next to her, holding her, whispering it'd be ok. Bucky wasn't even there at all. It was just Cecelia in her room.
Her door opened, and she looked over. "Ceil, what are you doing up, baby?" Natasha asked as she looked inside to see Cecelia, sitting on her floor.
"I had a nightmare." She said, putting a hand through her sweaty hair. Her breathing was still heavy as she sat there.
"Ok, ok. Let's get you back in your bed." Natasha said as she walked into Cecelia's room. Cecelia was still heaving, it was hurting her chest. She put a hand to her chest as she sat there.
"Tasha, I-I can't." Cecelia said, Natasha put her hand on Cecelia's heart as she crouched down.
"You're okay, baby. You're okay." Natasha said, sitting in front of her. Cecelia's eyes were squinted shut as she tried her best to breath in and out.
"I'm sorry." Cecelia whispered as Natasha wrapped her arms around her. The two were sitting on the floor together as Cecelia sobbed in the older woman's arms.
"It's not your fault. It was never your fault."Natasha said, putting her chin on top of Cecelia's head. Cecelia let out a shaky breath as Natasha whispered positive things in her ear. "They took advantage of you, baby." Natasha said as Cecelia's cries turned into sobs. She didn't think she deserved the comfort she was receiving from her. She didn't deserve the motherly love. She failed. She failed everyone.
Cecelia's door opened again to reveal Steve. "Steve, get a water, now." Natasha said, feeling Cecelia's quick heartbeat. Natasha put her hands through Cecelia's hair as she held her. "You're ok, breath Ceil. Just breath." Natasha said, kissing her head. She smelled the scent of her coconut shampoo that she used when she washed it.
"It hurt so bad, 'Tasha." Cecelia cried into the crook of her neck. Natasha nodded her head as she squeezed her tightly. "I wanted them to stop, I didn't want it." She sobbed, her voice was shaky as she spoke. Natasha knew what she was talking about. It broke her heart. Because the Red Room did the same thing to her, Dreykov did it all.
"I know, baby. I'm sorry, I'm so sorry." She said as tears pricked at her eyes. Cecelia didn't deserve that. Just a little kid being forced into a world of murder.
No one deserved that, no matter what they did. No one deserved to be raped, or forced to do things against your own will. No one should endure that kind of pain. "I just want to be ok again." Cecelia said, Natasha rubbed her back. Her chin rested on Cecelia's head.
"It's gonna be ok." Natasha lied, it wasn't ever going to be ok. She'd been 18+ since she was 4 years old, no one could ever be okay because of that. She was brought into a world of pain and tragedy.
At the ripe age of 4 she was taken from her home, which her parents willingly let her be taken so they could get money from it. They sold their kid into being a murderer. Every single day of her life she was a murderer, she was The Asset, The Hydra Soldier. No one cared about who she really was.
No one cared that she was a little girl, trying to break out of an assassins skin. She was trapped, a small girl in a killer's body, begging to come out. She begged to be free, begged to do the right thing.
When she did. the wrong thing she was punished. It didn't matter what the punishment was, as long as she got sense knocked into her, Hydra didn't care. As long as she learned from her lessons, they could've done whatever they wanted.
Steve came in with a water. He sat behind Cecelia, the water to Natasha. Natasha stopped hugging her and she handed it to Cecelia. "Drink the water." She said handing it to her. Cecelia's hand shook as she took it from her. She took a sip of it, as Natasha nodded her head.
"There you go, baby." She said as Cecelia took a deep breath. "Keep breathing, ok?" Natasha asked as Cecelia sniffled. Natasha wiped her tears with her thumbs as Cecelia consoled herself.
"You ok?" Steve asked, Cecelia nodded her head. Tears started to spill down her face. Her put the water down, shaking her head now.
"I want my dad." She sobbed, Steve brought her in for a hug, Natasha doing the same. The two embraced her as she broke down. "I'm sorry." She sobbed out, they shook their heads.
"It's not your fault, Ceil. It never was." Steve said as she fell back into his chest. Steve smoothed her curly hair out, trying to her her to calm down.
"Let's get you back into your bed, okay?" Steve asked, she nodded her head. Natasha picked up her water and put it on her bedside table. Steve removed himself from behind Cecelia, and her body hit the floor.
"Ok." He sighed before picking her up. It was harder since she was a healthy 5'9 girl with legs almost as long as his. He placed her on the bed, and pulled her blankets over her. He smoothed her hair back and looked down at her.
"You're ok, Ceil. They're gone now." He said, she nodded her head as her eyes grew heavy.
"I love you." She said as her eyes closed. The two smiled a bit.
"We love you to."
a/n:
i'm sorry
YOU ARE READING
innocent
FanfictionBehind The Winter Soldier was the Hydra Soldier. The Hydra Soldier was his student, his right hand man, his partner. The Hydra Soldier was a kid, a little girl by the name of Celia.
