Being the Dark Lord's daughter and raised under the strict supervision of the Malfoy's is no easy life. Especially if you start crushing on your father's arch-nemesis, Harry Potter. And that while being engaged to one of his follower's sons.
The truth behind your bandaged arm is that you don't know how else you could hide the Dark Mark.
The redhead seems to be satisfied with your answer and drops the hostile position.
You give Hermione a smile, but she looks concerned. "Are you sure you're okay? You look... tired." She gives your shoulder a reassuring squeeze that says that you can tell her anything.
But you can't. At least not this.
"Yeah, no. I'm fine. Just tired. And happy to go back to school."
The subject of you gets dropped after that. The trio understand — with all that they went through — when someone doesn't want to talk about it. And you're glad they do.
You walk with them towards the carriages that take you to Hogwarts when you encounter your cousin and friends. He tries to intimidate Harry, but the boy quickly advances towards the boy. If Ron didn't hold him back, you were sure Harry would have punched Draco.
Theodore slows in his steps and looks at you. You meet his eyes and quickly look away. A guilty feeling gnaws at your heart at the hurt look on his face.
"What's with you and Theodore Nott?", asks Hermione as she catches the silent exchange. "You two seemed so... happy before summer."
You look sadly at the back of the boy's brown curls. How can you explain that Voldemort has taken residence in your home and that, in your mind, the only thing you can do to protect Theodore from the Dark Lord is pushing him away?
You contemplate your words as you wait for a carriage, Neville catching up to you four. As you want to answer you hear Harry question what is pulling the carriages. You turn around and gasp out.
What once was pulled by magic, now stands a black, leathery creature with white eyes and looks so meagre, it's almost emaciated.
"It's beautiful", you whisper, stepping closer to the black... horse? You reach out a hand and touch the beak of the creature.
You've heard about the creatures before. Only people who stared death in the eyes can see them. The petrified look of the dead muggle flashes through your mind and you clamp your eyes shut, willing the tears not to spill.
"Don't worry, you're just as sane as I am", says a dreamy voice from into the carriage and all five of you look up. Luna Lovegood. Pale hair and even paler skin. A Ravenclaw girl a year below you. And that's all you know about her.
The ride to the castle is spent in silence with Luna trying to start a conversation but is met with awkward silence. It doesn't seem like she minds.
You dread the moment you have to go to the Slytherin table for the feast. Sitting as far away from your cousin, you watch how some toad-faced lady from the Ministry is introduced as the new DADA professor. She interrupts Dumbledore's speech, and a soft gasp makes its way through the Great Hall. Umbridge's speech makes one thing clear, and that is that it is another year with a worthless teacher.
Just when you need a decent one the most.
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"You've been ignoring me." A bag drops on the table you occupy in the library. It's the farthest one away from everybody, on the top floor in between bookshelves nobody uses. And it annoys you that someone has found you.
Term has been going on for a handful of weeks. The new DADA teacher, Dolores Umbridge, is a worthless teacher and only gives theory lessons. She says that there is no need for you to practice the spells. Sucks to be a practical learner I guess.
So, you've taken the need to study more as an opportunity to avoid Draco and his friends.
"I'm not ignoring you, Draco. I'm just busy studying for the O.W.L.s. Like you should do." You glare at him before turning back to read the same page over since he dropped into your space.
Draco's posture seems to slump a bit before he leans closer. "You should talk to Nott. He's been going practically crazy ever since you've been giving him the cold shoulder."
Slamming your book shut loudly, you turn angry towards your cousin. "Drop. It", you hiss between teeth. "You know why and you know it's for his own safety."
Draco rolls his eyes. "Please. I would feel honoured to bear it."
Sudden anger boils in the pit of your stomach. You don't know what possesses you, but you angrily take Draco by the front of his blouse and pull him closer to you. "You don't know how it feels. I feel it. I feel it slither under my skin, pulsate and burn. I feel him. His lingering presence, breathing down my neck.
"So don't tell me what to feel. The only thing I feel is anger and the want to cut my fucking arm off."
You release him and collect your books. The wide-eyed scared look brings satisfaction to you as you stomp out of the library.
