Hunter's Chance

n i n e

I'm beyond thankful that my car started without any problems, but even more thankful that I made it to work on time. Devin is, as per usual, standing behind the front desk when I walk into the gym. I immediately notice that his black hair is shorter, and styled differently. It has a clean crisp line on the left side where the rest of his hair is pushed over to the right, a trend I've begin to notice has been walking in and out of the gym like crazy.

He doesn't acknowledge me when I walk past him, I was half expecting a smartass comment, a possible nudge of the shoulder, something. He feels off but then I don't care enough to call him on it. 

I grab my nametag and slide it over my neck before making my way to the computer to clock in. Steve is back from vacation and his freshly tanned skin and perfectly white teeth are picture perfect for an ad on how not to look as a forty five year old single male. Steve is the manager at the gym and has been for fifteen plus years.

"With a smile like that, you're hired. No need for an interview." He told me a year ago and I was completely and utterly thankful for that. I'll forever be in debt to him. My mom had been struggling, as she does now but maybe just a little bit worse. She had a hard time paying the bills. Something about needing her booze seemed to be a bit more important. Each time that I would visit home I would notice that the bills would stack up a little bit higher, the pantry slowly but surely became empty, and there were liquor bottles shoved under the bed. 

I knew then that I had to take it upon myself. I immediately started looking for jobs and lucked out when I met Steve and without hesitation, I was hired. I started first with stocking the pantry. Conner had to eat. That was most important to me. I then took on the bills, which took me months to pay off. But at least now I know for future reference how to tackle a settlement, and how to shut up the collector.

I think my persistence kicked my mom in the ass though. I began to notice that every time I came home, the pantry had already been stocked. The only important mail that she was receiving were wedding invitations coming from my friends getting married way too young. And there was even a time where I snuck into her room, I took a massive breath and got down on my hands and knees, checking under her bed to find that it was completely clear. The bottles were nowhere to be found.

I guess more than anything, she was and still is progressing. But that doesn't take away the fact that I'm pissed off at her ninety nine percent of the time and seeing Conner in that state the last time that I was home, set something off inside of me. I never knew it was possible but I'm more ticked off now then I think I've ever been at her. I want her to grow up. I want to be the one screwing up and making the mistakes, as I am the child, and she is the mother.

Though now that I feel some new sense of responsibility, I don't know what it feels like to goof off and really, truly have fun. I mean sure, I've had my fair share of laughs and mishaps but nothing close to what I remember. Nothing close to what it feels like to laugh so hard I get an aching pain in my stomach. No, that hasn't happened in years and I fear the possibility that it may never happen again.  

The day has gone by slow, so slow that I've caught myself multiple times resting my head on my hand and drifting off. It isn't until a familiar, recently pummeled, face walks into the gym that finally wakes me up. Matt's face is bashed in pretty good, and I can't help but smile at the thought of James kicking his ass. He deserved it, all of it.

 "Raegan, can I get your help with something?" Steve calls from the back office and I let out a massive sigh of relief that I didn't realize I was holding.

"Yeah, be right there!" I call back to him.

Just when I opened my big mouth, Matt's eyes dart to mine and what looks like fear takes over his face. He probably thinks I'm going to tell everyone about his little escapade from last night, but I think the beating he took was well enough of punishment. He knows to stay the hell away from me now.