𝐆𝐢𝐥𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞 𝐆𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬☕︎︎

02x16 - Theres The Rub

EMILY: My goodness, you make it sound like heaven.

LORELAI: It's as close as you'll ever come to being a dog.

EMILY: I beg your pardon?

LORELAI: You know, a whole life of nothing but eating, sleeping, lying on your back and getting rubbed.

EMILY: I'd love the comparison to stop there.

LORELAI: Deal. Um, hey, when's it for?

EMILY: This weekend, actually.

LORELAI: Oh, well, I'll be there.

EMILY: So will I.

LORELAI: Excuse me?

EMILY: Well, the certificate is for two, and since you make it sound like the most wonderful place in the world, I might as well try it with you.

LORELAI: Oh, but - .

EMILY: That's all right, isn't it, if I join you? You don't mind?

LORELAI: No, I don't mind at all.

EMILY: Wonderful. I'll pick you up tomorrow morning. You know, I'm actually looking forward to this.

LORELAI: Oh yeah, me too. Thanks Mom. Buh bye.

CUT TO INSIDE LUKE'S

[Rory is sitting at the table holding the umbrella over her head. Lorelai walks in and sits down]

LORELAI: I'm going to a spa with my mother.

RORY: Lean forward.

[opening credits]

CUT TO LORELAI'S BEDROOM

[Lorelai is sitting on the bed as Rory walks around packing a suitcase]

LORELAI: [on phone] So, then we're all confirmed. Uh, great. Thanks so much for your help. Okay, bye. [hangs up] Yeeessss!

RORY: That was an evil yes.

LORELAI: Not an evil yes. It's a yes, I'm pretty, but hello, I'm smart' kind of a yes.

RORY: Oh, my mistake.

LORELAI: So here's the deal I go into my facial just as my mother is finishing her salt glow, which will end ten minutes after I've h*t my scalp treatment which puts me in the watsu massage pool at least six minutes into her back facial. Uh, in fact, the day is so well planned, I won't see her until dinner which will be cut tragically short by the food poisoning I plan to contract.

RORY: You are twelve and disgusting.

LORELAI: I am trapped and desperate.

RORY: You really think you can avoid Grandma the entire weekend?

LORELAI: Hey, I'm nothing if not a great organizer. Now, let's talk about what you're gonna do tonight. Throwing a party, I hope? Inviting hundreds of bikers and lowlifes who are gonna trash the place?

RORY: I am going to do laundry, watch TV, order Indian food and go to bed early.

LORELAI: And then come the bikers and lowlifes who are gonna trash the place?

RORY: I may even fall asleep on the couch with the TV on.

LORELAI: When do the bikers and lowlifes get to trash the place?

RORY: You're all packed.

LORELAI: Rory, you have to do something bad when Mommy's out of town. It's the law. You're seen Risky Business, right? Now I'm not asking for a prostitution ring, but how about a floating craps game or something?