Come Back My Light

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NOTE:

Come back

Don't leave me the shadow mumbled

but the light danced away, fading and leaving the shadow to dwell alone.

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Basically, Tony's Pov of My Light Diminishes.... but I got very, very carried away and couldn't bring myself to cut out any part of the story. So enjoy this, and if you want me to write more or add something answer a question about the story. Leave a comment.

Also! If you notice some of the dialogue different by a few words or extra sentences its on purpose, because of how Tony interoperates the situation vs how we did in the previous chapter.

ENJOY :)

PS: If you wondering word count is 17515...

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Tony had never felt peace. He knew he doesn't deserve to, it was his job to be at the world's beck and call. Even if they didn't know he was the one under the red and gold armour. He became 'Ironman' after he realised he put a lot of bad into the world and could save it.

He didn't know how much of a burden it was to keep his identity hidden. Despite his secrecy SHIELD found him, debriefed him and gave him the superhero lecture on how to save the world and keep it a secret. He hated the latter, he hated the feeling of lying to his loved ones, hated telling them a lie because they trusted them. She trusted him full-heartedly and he almost wished she didn't.

Y/n was the love of his screwed-up life. And he was waiting for the day she awoke from whatever mirage she was living and realised she deserved better than what he could give her. She never complained, which is what made the problem worse. He felt dirty, but not in the sense that he would normally be associated with, he felt filthy sneaking around the room talking to Jarvis and using his spare time which he would much rather spend with his loving wife, to talk to his AI and work on his suit.

He realised he would be late home again. And if he was alone he would be berating himself for making her go to bed alone again. But he wasn't; he couldn't fly home and run into her arms. Not yet. He had to cozy up with senators and politicians as SHIELD instructed him to. Using his billionaire CEO persona, which arguably was just his natural flare.

SHIELD suspected someone or a group of people were aligned with HYDRA and working against them and potentially were close to figuring out Tony's identity. Tony was mainly focusing on the latter, because, he couldn't let HYDRA know, he couldn't let them get close to his life, because in par came you. And if something happened to you because of him? Because of the mantel, he picked up he would never forgive himself, wouldn't want himself to forgive himself.

The politicians were the same pretentious men he would mock and complain about to you, only he had to force a smile and try to match his charm to persuade him they were similar. He knew you would hate to hear how he was acting, he could imagine you standing on the other side of the room, a champagne flute raised to your pursed lips and clenched jaw. Your fist would be white from how tightly you would clench it, and your posture would be stiff and tense but it wouldn't take away from your beauty. And if you made eye contact with him he would see your anger, your hurt and he would internally scream at himself to chase after you and beg you to understand but you weren't here. You were home, unaware and tucked up in bed after eating alone and wishing for him to come home.

He laughed at something Senator Stern said, his laugh rolled off his tongue begrudgingly, the joke was like everything the vile man spoke fondly of, women and what he wanted to do with the younger ones. Tony would feel his stomach churn at the thought, anger bubbling at the mental imagery of what he would say about you. In Stern's opinion, you were perfect to cook and clean and provide him with an abundance of children and he would no doubt love explaining how he conceived each child.

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