In all tragedies, and retellings of awful events, they talk about the screams. The screams of the dieing, the ones pleading to anything and everything to save them. The screams of the ones who have not lost hope, but... noone talks about the silence that follows. The silence that is louder than anything you can imagine. The screams may follow you, but the silence will always be with you.
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1937
In an assisted living facility
Tick...
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"Is she really one of the survivors?" a voice whispers.
Tick...
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Tick...
"Yes but she has never opened up about it." another voice answers
Tick...
Tick..
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"But its been so long since..."
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"I know, but she refuses. I can only imagine the horrors that plauge her..." the whisper pauses.
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"The only ever time she talks is in her sleep... or when it is silent."
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"Is that why she has such a loud clock? To keep the silence away?"
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"Yes now come along lets see if we can get her to eat anything..."
The former whiper now turns into a cheery voice as a female nurse opens the door to a dreary room only illuminated by the grey light that hazily comes in through the partialy closed curtains. "Good morning Mrs. Braw. I have your morning soup!" A bowl of soup rattled on a tray that was in her hands as she walked in.
Tick...
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A male nurse slips in behind the first nurse and walks over to the window to fully open the window. It was raining outside so he tried to let in as much light as he could by pulling back the curtains all the way. More grey light poured in and illuminated the original occupant of the room. A middle aged woman sat in her arm chair, just staring out the window. Although only in her 50's she looked as though she could be in her 70's. The wrinkles that framed her face slightly sagged and her silver hair covered her face in unkept clumps. Her eyes were a hazel color but they were dull with no help of the outside light to bring any shine to them.
Tick...
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Tick..
An old grandfather clocked echoed in the room as the nurses busied themselves with their morning tasks. "Mrs. Braw, I have some good news. A flourist has agreed to donate flowers to all our in house patients. Would you like to recieve some? The ones you revieved last time seemed to have wilted and a splash of color is always good to brighten up ones life." The male nurse informed her. He was refrencing the flowers on the dresser in the the corner that had long since wilted, but noone had done anything about it. Mrs. Braw never responded, even as her vitals were being take.
Tick...
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The female nurse had since set the tray on the end table next to the armchair Mrs. Braw was seated in. She walked over to the dresser and pulled out a set of clothes for the day. The nurse then gently helped change Mrs. Braw out of her night gown and into some new clothes. "Can you stand for me Mrs. Braw?" she asked.
Tick...
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Mrs. Braw slowley turned her head to the female nurse. Her eyes focused ever so slightly but were still dull. With a sigh, she heaved herself up from her armchair and turned her head back to the window. The female nurse changed her out of her night gown and into some comfy day clothes. "Thank you Mrs. Braw you may sit down again if you like." Mrs. Braw then sank back down into her chair.
Tick...
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"Well our work here is done. If you need anything, you know how to press the button and we will be right in to help. Before we go, would you like us to turn on the radio?" The male nurse asked.
Tick...
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Tick...
There was no response. The nurses looked at each other awkwardly. The grandfather clock seemed to be the only living thing in this room with its ticks still echoing loudly in the room. The rain which was slowly starting to ease was rapping on the window. "Well... we will be going now." The female nurse broke the 'silence' "As my partner here has said, if you need anything please dont hesitate to press the call button. We will be here. If you do not need anything else, we will see you when we deliver your lunch." She did a curt little bow and made her way out of the room with the male nurse right behind her. They closed the door with a click.
Tick...
Tick...
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The rain comtinued to slow untill it came to a stop. The clock now the only thing making any noise.
Tick...
Tick...
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Tick....
Tick......
Tick.......
The time between the ticks slowly grew and almost like clockwork, Mrs. Braw rose from her chair once again, but this time she hobbled to the clock. She brought her hand up from her side and slowly reached it abover her head. She used her other hand to brace herself against the clock as she rose to her tip toes. With the raised hand, she placed it on the top of the clock and began to feel around. Her hand brushed against a small metel object. She picked it up and grasped it in her hand and she brought it down but only to the clocks face. Right in the center of the face was a hole. With the metel object stillnin her grasp she placed it in the hole. It was the key.
Tick.......
Tick........
Tick........
Mrs. Braw began to slowly wind the clock up. But as it began to wind, it became harder and harder to turn. Then her hand slipped and she lost her balance. The old clock couldnt hold her up and both came topplingpp down with a loud thud and crash.
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The dust settled
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The silence came.
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"It's....coooOOOOOOOOOLLLLLD!" Mrs. Braw shrieked! With the silence her mind was plumged to the last time she felt anything.
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25 Years Prior
On a ship
It was only a slight shudder, if you even felt it, but it was enough to wake Mrs. Braw. She turned her head to the sleeping form next to her. "Jacob... did you feel that?"
"Hmm..." Jacob stirred and with his eyes still closed he responded "Feel what Mair..." he was still groggy as he called her by her nickname
"I felt a shudder.. Jacob something feels off." She presisted.
Jacob opened his eyes and turned to his wife in the darkness. "Mary.. we are on a boat.. it shudders all the time... now go back to sleep while our son is still sleeping." He was ready to turn back over to go back to sleep but Mary was already sitting up and swinging her legs out of bed. She stood up up in a hurry and was grabbing her coat. She made her way to the crib that was positioned on the other side of the bed.
Jacob sat up in bed and yawned. "You really going to wake him up? He was sleeping so soundly for once." He slowly got to his feet without any more compaint and grabbed his own coat. He then handed Mary the extra baby blanket to wrap their son in. "We don't want Little Matthew to catch his death."
Mary smiled at her husband and wrapped Matthew in the extra blanket.
After bundling up, the family made their way out of the room. Stewards were running around. Jacob got the attention of one of them. "Ma'am, is everything alright? My wife felt a weird shudder, and it is making her feel uneasy."
The steward looked startled but quickly composed herself "Oh... nothing is the mattter please go back to bed..." She averted her gaze and quickly scurried by. The response did nothing to calm Mary's nerves and only raised suspicion for Jacob. Jacob gently placed his hand on his wife's back and gently lead her down the hall. "Come on Mair... lets head top-side."
The couple with their young baby weaved down the corridors and made there way up from second class. By the time they made their way to the main deck, not much was happening but the normal partying. There was a strange feeling hanging in the air though. The night was clear and crisp and deckhands were scurring around, amost like the stewards. One of them spotted the Braw family and made his way to them. He was on edge and jittery but did his best to seem calm.
"I have this uneasy feeling so I was hoping the fresh air might clear my mind. My husband Jacob did not want me to come up hear alone and of course we couldnt leave our baby alone so we decided to go up together.... Tell me good sir, are you alright?... Everyone seems on edge." Mary replied. She looked at the crewman closely. His eyes quickly darted to the side but then returned her gaze.
"Everything is fine for now but..." the crewman paused
"But what?" Jacob pressed
"I would maybe think about grabbing your life vests. Just as a percaution."
"A percaution for what... is the boat going down?" Mary held Matthew tighter and Jacob pulled her closer.
"No, no, no... we just hit... something has happened and while we get it fixed we just want people to be safe." The crewman never did finish his thought before changing it, but Mary and Jacob got the message loud and clear none the less. They quickly made their way back to their cabin to grab their life vests.
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By the time the Braw family made it back up to the deck, there was alot more commotion going on. Crewmen were buzzing about barking orders and many other of the passengers had made it up to the main deck as well; if they were not already up there from the late night party. Everyone was wearing life vests and more and more people were coming from the lower decks. It was quickly getting more and more crowded.
A deckhand came from behind the Braw family and started ushering them forward. "Come about please, watch your step. The life boats are this way."
"Life boats? I thought this boat was un-" Jacob was cut off before he could finish
"Just a percaution please hurry." The crewman shoved the family forward and ushered others to follow. As they neared the life boat, everything was becoming more chaotic.
"WOMEN AND CHILDREN FIRST" A man with a megaphone was barking orders at the crowd. Mary was starting to get pushed and pulled through the crowed but Jacob held onto her firm. She looked up at her husband scared "Will they seperate us?" she almost whimpered. Jacob shook his head no but never said anything. He was looking ahead towards the life boat in hopes to see what was going on.
The ground benieth them slowly began to slant downwards toward the bow amd the crewman were rushing the passengers forward. Flares started to burst overhead. As the mass of people were making their way to the smaller boat, Mary could piece together what was going on by all the conversations around her. Their boat had hit an ice burg and it was going down.
"WOMEN AND CHILDREN FIRST" was once again repeated and Mary clung on to Jacob. Women were crying and men were hugging them. All the children seem to be in a panic. Ice chunks that Mary never noticed were begining to slide down toward the bow area and the goind slanted even more. A Band was playing somewhere but she could not see where.
They had finaly made it to the front of the line. A crewman grabbed Mary by the waist and began to almost fling her and Matthew into the life boat. She started to scream.
"JAKE!" She screamed for her husband and she began to squirm. The crewman did not loosen his grip as he hastely placed her into the boat.
"JAKE!" she screamed again and she tried to reach her hand out to her husband. Jacob was being held back by a deckhand
"I am sorry sir but Women and Children first!"
"BUT MY WIFE AND CHILD ARE IN THERE. I AM ALL THEY HAVE!" He struggled against the crewman. He looked down at Mary and she looked up at him. Tears were streaming down her face. "Don't leave me." she whimpered. Jacob broke free right as they were lowering the life boat. Mary reached out her hand as far as she could and Jake reached down over the railing just to hold her hand one last time. Before their hands could touch the boat was lowered out of reach. Jacob called to her "I will find another boat. I will find you! I promise." Although he would do his best, he knew deep down that it would be futile. He tried to hold back the tears so Mary couldnt see them, but she saw them anyway. She could read her husbands face and tears streamed down her cheek. "I LOVE YOU!" she cried.
A person from the deck leaped over the railing and landed in the life boat hap hazardly. Causing the boat to rock which in turned caused Mary and Matthew to topple over the side of the boat. She could hear the screams around her as she fell.
Mary landed with a splash into the icey water and let out a scream before it was cut short. The cold shock to her system caused her to tense up and she couldnt let out a sound. Salty sea water also rushed into her mouth and she began coughing. The screams could still be heard all around her despite her being in the water.
Thankfuly the life vest kept her afloat while she regained her control. Matthew at this point after being tossled around was already crying but it was the first time Mary was able to realize it. Looking up she could see the lofe boat she fell out of was being lowered on top of her. She kicked as hard as she could to get out of the way before they were crushed. Each movement seemed to drain her and she felt like she was making no progress, but Mary was somehow able to make it out of the way. Once the life boat was in the water the people in the life boat were able to pull her and Matthew on board.
Mary and her son began to shiver almost violently. After that plunge, they were losing body heat fast. She was also exhausted after her swim in the cold water. The other women in the life boat huddled close to them but were too afraid to open up their jackets to them. Matthew at this point has grown silent. Mary tried to look up at the thong of people above her still on the main ship. She was hoping to see her husband. She just knew that she saw her fall and she wanted more than anything to let him know she was alright. So he wouldnt stop fighting to find her, but she couldnt see him. All she could see was the distorted faces of the people left behind as they screamed.
The flares continued to flash and bang over head as the life boat quickly rowed away from the ship that was once called unsinkable. Mary could see the back of the ship now lifting into the air as the bow sunk more and more into the water. She closed her eyes tight and prayed with all her might. She didnt even know what she was praying for, just for a miracle.
Suddenly the lights of the ship finally flickered out and with a massive defening groan, the ship began to split in two. A smoke stack lost all its strength and collapsed into the water.
The scream could be heard. So many screams. Mary tried to close her eyes even tighter in hopes to even block out the sound. She held Matthew as he grew cold. She looked down into her arms when she felt the stiffness and begain to wail. Her cries blended into the screams of the night.
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It wasnt long before everything was silent though. Even Mary had lost her voice. She had almost wished for the screaming to continue. The screams meant they were alive. It meant that her husband could be alive. It meant her baby might still be with her. The screams meant life, but only silence and death greeted her ears. It was deafening.
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Many hours later as the sun was cresting the horizon, a ship was spotted in the distance. People began to yell and scream. Mary couldnt tell if it was for joy or to get their attention but to her it didnt matter. The silence had gone on for too long. She couldnt even remember climbing aboard the new ship that was to save them or when she finally let go of her dead baby. She couldnt even remember how she got into the hospital bed. She remembered none of it. All she could hear was the silence.
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1937
As soon as the crash was heard, the two nurses came rushing into Mary's room. "Mrs. Braw!" The male nurse rushed forward to help her up while the female nurse was right beside him. "Get the doctor! Let him know what has happened!" The female nurse nodded.
"ITS COOOOOLLLLLLLD!" Mary wailed again. "Its cold. Its cold. It cold.." Mary began to whimper and tears fell from her eyes that were now full of pain and terror. Everyone talks about the wails and the screams, but noone talks about the silence. The terror of the silence.
