Illicit Affair (GxG)

SC: Lively

"Avila po."

Oh, so she's Khione Avila. She really looks like her mother.

"Ms. Avila, please get inside."

Kaagad naman niyang sinunod ang sinabi ko at pumasok na, I went inside right after and smiled as I saw the new students that I'll be handling.

Tulad ng lagi 'kong ginagawa ay nagpakilala muna ako sa kanilang lahat, since I don't know most of them and I don't want to bored them with starting the discussions rigjt away, I initiated a fun game.

Everyone has their first impressions on anyone, it could be positive or negative, so I thought of a game that will give them the chance to correct what they think that does not align with their personalities.

"By the end of the game, isa-isa nating babasahin lahat ng nakasulat sa papel and pick one that you think is wrong about you tsaka mo naman ito itatama." They all shouted in excitement as the game finally started.

I can't help but to take a glance at her whenever I see her smile, the way her nose scrunches up in a cute little way, and even the way she pouts when she reads something funny.

"Miss, paikot na po tayo."

Nagulat nalang ako nang maramdaman ko ang mahinang pag tapik sa'kin ng isang estudyante ko, I almost forgot that we were in a game.

"Oh my gosh. I'm sorry, I'll just write something quickly."

It was the last round before the papers went back to its original owners. A lot of their impressions say that I was kind, fun, warm and even compliments were written on the paper. But one impression caught my eye immediately as it was the longest phrase that was written there.

Everyone took turns picking one impression from their papers and corrected those wrong ones, when it was her turn, I could see the way she became shy and even hesitating to say her words.

"..I'll just say, don't expect too much from me. Kung tutuusin, I just feel like I'm an average student, a mediocre one. Masipag at nadadala lang talaga sa tiyaga, but yeah, I guess.. that's it?" Her ears were even turning red as she sat down on her chair.

"Miss, ikaw na po."

"O-oh, sorry. I got lost in my thoughts."

Gosh. What the hell is happening to me?

"I'm quite flattered to hear everyone's impression about me, but there's something that I'd like to share before we end this session. It might be true that all of you think I'm kind and fun. But with this phrase 'Knows how to handle everything on her own.' I don't. Sometimes I still get scared of uncertainties and unexpected situations where I feel like I'm trapped. I realized that I felt like a lost child wandering around this big world– trying to survive our own hell called life."

It was true.

It's easy for people to think that we're doing well and handling things fine, but they may not realize that deep down, we also feel lost and confused. The way we manage things on the outside doesn't always reflect what's going on the inside.

I smiled as what I said earned a few chuckles from them, but became serious as they listened again.  "That's why I always try to be very understanding for students like you because I know how it feels to be in that situation. Fine arts is a degree program that a lot of people feel like an escape from. Kaya naman, I am here to help you with that. To help everyone feel safe to pursue this as it will eventually make you happy."

My eyes averted towards her, she was listening intently like it was a discussion that she shouldn't miss. Tumatango pa nga siya habang nagsasalita ako kanina.