Iris

28 | answers

— N O L A N ' S   P O V —

     "HUNTING FOR ANSWERS is no different from suicide," I had once been told. "You should go out prepared. You should expect to get attacked by those who linger in the shadows. You should expect to get hurt and injured by those who want to hold you back."

The clock ticked, its hands moving in an indication that time was passing—that I was running out of chances. My actions were fast and uncalculated as I rapidly tied my shoelaces. Once I was done, I threw the black duffel bag over my shoulder, grunting under my breath in response to its unusual heaviness.

"Whilst searching for answers, you become the prey, Nolan," the same person had told me. "You'll find yourself getting hunted. You'll become the new target."

My steps were swift and subtle, leaving no traces behind, yet the constant pokes aimed at my leg didn't fail to get on my nerves, making my jaw clench tightly. My gaze wandered with caution once my room's door was closed, scanning over the entire length of the hallway to make sure that no one was up.

"If you're seeking answers, you should be ready to get dragged into the black hole of questions because nothing will make sense. Not in the beginning. And you'll be desperate. You'll be so, so desperate for answers that you won't even mind risking your life for them."

Twisting the doorknob, I opened the door leading to Iris' room, only for a faint smile to creep onto my lips. Her face was concealed from sight by the book she had shoved in her face, and her hair sat in a mess atop her head with most of it being concealed by the blanket she'd pulled over her head.

She lowered the book, grinning once her gaze locked with mine. "Hi."

"Hello, munchkin," I replied, my mind barely processing the words brushing past my lips. But then again, it was like that with Iris all the time. Her presence made breathing a little easier and made the pain a tad more bearable. Her grin was enough to lighten up the darkness occupying my head and to bandage the bleeding wounds her absence had once left on my heart. "Make sure you don't let Roman see you awake, okay? And if anyone asks about me, I'm in the gym."

My little sister nodded, casting me a warm grin of hers before she buried her head in her book again. Lingering in the doorway, I swallowed my bitter saliva and let the lie burn my throat. I hated lying. I hated it. But this lie was important. It was essential.

"You'll lie, Nolan. You'll lie to the same people you once looked in the eye as you promised them honesty. You'll believe that lying is the only route that'll lead you to the truth."

Atlas was asleep in his room, his head buried underneath his blankets and his hand clinging to a framed picture from our childhood.

"You'll lose yourself in the process."