Gone But Never Forgotten (Raphael ROTTMNT AU)

Chapter 2

[About two days after the Kraang invasion]

Raph was sitting with Casey, Splinter, and Mikey, watching a Lou Jitsu movie, when Donnie came in, getting everyone, but mainly Raph's, attention. "I think I figured out a bit more about your eye, and what it has to do with the Kraang," he said. Raph quickly jumped up and followed Donnie to his lab. His younger brother took him to where the samples were, and grabbed a few papers. "It seems that while yes the infection is affecting your eye, it's actually affecting your brain more, which of course causes your body to react. It seems that-" Raph didn't hear the rest of what he said.
All Raph heard was the voice of Kraang.
"Get him." is all it said. Once again, Raph felt as if he had blacked out. Coming back to reality soon after. Raph felt like he couldn't move, again. He was holding his brother by the arm, tight. Donnie's tech-bo was on the complete other side of the room, and he looked terrified. Raph slowly let go of Donnie, who slowly backed up and grabbed the bo. Raph looked around a bit more, now realizing how much of a mess he must have caused. He looked back at his brother, "Donnie I..I'm so sorry..I don't know what came over me.." he said, looking down. Donnie nodded, keeping his distance and staying near the door.
Casey came running in with his weapon, looking around. "What happened?! Are you guys okay?!" He said, panicked.
Donnie nodded, "We're alright Casey, you can go back to whatever you were doing.." he said. Casey left the room and Donnie sat Raph back down.
"Seriously Donnie, I am so sorry, I don't even know what I did! I have no memory of it! All I remember is.." Raph stopped talking. Donnie looked up at him. "Raph remembers..Hearing Kraang's voice..T-They told Raph to get you.." Raph curled up, as much as someone like him could.
Donnie seemed taken aback, "You HEARD it? Like literally?" he asked. Raph nodded, looking down. Donnie quickly got up and went to his, now knocked over desk, and grabbed a paper. "That means one of my theories is likely correct."
Raph was confused, "What theory?" he asked.
Donnie shook his head. He hid the paper and went back over. "If my theory is correct, I can't tell you. I believe you'll lash out again like you just did."
Raph slowly nodded, of course being confused, and upset, and honestly kind of scared of himself. He left Donnie's room and headed to his own. He didn't want to be near anybody. He didn't want to hurt them, especially when everyone was still healing. But, just as Raph was calming down, Leo came busting in.
"Hey big guy! How ya feeling?" Leo asked, leaning on the wall. Raph noticed his new shell covering. Leo saw him stare at it, "You like it? I let Mikey paint stuff on it." he added.
Raph nodded, "It looks good.." he said, sighing. "Raph's still sorry about the other day when he..Well..You know.."
"Yeah yeah, I already forgave you Raph. No need to beat yourself up about it, it was a bit scary but I know you didn't mean to." Leo replied, trying to reassure his older brother, "Besides, you look badass with the new scar on your eye!" This made Raph laugh a bit.
"I guess so," Raph smiled. "But..Raph did it to Donnie too.." he said back.
"Yeah, Casey said he ran in there and Donnie's lab was trashed. But he said you were both fine so no one wanted to pry. . .Besides Mikey but whatever-" Leo replied, seeming quite chill about the situation, at least to Raph. Raph nodded. "Oh yeah, the reason I came in here was to ask what you wanted on your pizza." Leo said.
Raph sighed, "You know what I want on it Leo."
"Pepperoni, sausage, bacon, and beef?" he asked. Raph nodded. "Alright! I'll tell Mikey." Leo replied, walking out.
Raph was alone again.
All alone.
Just him and his thoughts.
None of them were exactly good. He felt horrible. He had attacked two of his brothers. What if he tried getting April or Casey next? Or Splinter? Or even Mikey? That thought was probably the scariest one to him. He didn't want his little brother to be scared of him.
Raph shook his head. Maybe he should just sleep for now. Yeah, he can take a nap. He laid down and shut his eyes, hoping he wouldn't wake up for a while.

Sadly that wasn't what happened. Raph had maybe been out for an hour, before April came busting in, waking Raph up.
"Hey big guy! I'm taking Casey to the Mystic Library and since you know your way around I was wondering if you could come with us" April said.
Raph sat up, rubbing his head, "Yeah, yeah I can come.." he said, getting up and following April to where Casey was.
"Alright! Let's get going! We need to find that book you were talking about." April said, holding Raph's hand. She could tell he was stressed, and he had to admit, having his hand be held did help ease his nerves a bit.
So they traveled to the library, in which Casey instantly got yelled at.
"So what book are you two lookin' for again?" Raph asked.
"We're looking for a book called The Myth of the Key," Casey replied. "It's a book on the history of the Kraang key-" April cut him off.
"It's about the history of the key that they knew of at the time. It's probably not accurate but we both want to know." she added. Casey nodded in agreement.
Raph went over to the librarian and quietly asked where they could find the book. She sighed, "Down the left, two stairs down, past the ibis tapestry," the librarian listed, "And remember, be quiet."
"Yes ma'am," Raph replied, dragging Casey and April with him. He kept repeating what the librarian said, mostly to actually remember it, but also to keep his mind off of his other thoughts. At least this time around the foot wasn't there and his brothers weren't there to scream, granted Casey had a lot of close cases. This trip definitely was going a lot faster than the last one, considering they found the book in minutes.
Casey grabbed the book and looked at it, "Finally! I've b-" April quickly covered his mouth.
In a very hushed voice she said "Be quiet Jones! We don't need you getting taken to the kiddy room! If you have one more slip up I'll make sure Raph keeps ya quiet-" April said, in which Casey almost immediately got loud again.
"Yes Commander O'Neil!" He nodded.
April facepalmed, took the book and just handed Casey to Raph. "That was your last chance, and I already said you don't gotta call me Commander all the time" she said. Raph didn't really know if he had the proper energy to try and keep Casey quiet but hopefully it wouldn't be that bad. He picked him up and continued walking, noticing Casey pouting a bit.
They left the library and got back out to the main square, when suddenly Raph stopped. His grip on Casey got tighter. Both of them looked at him.
"Raph? You okay?" April asked.
"Yeah, you're holding onto me a little tight.." Casey added, trying to escape Raph's grasp.
"Crush them."
Once again, for Raph, everything went black.

When he came back to reality, all of the strangers were staring at him, along with April and Casey. They both looked beat up. Raph looked around, "What happened..?" he asked.
April and Casey slowly approached him, "You attacked me and Casey.." she said. Well, that much was obvious.
"Can we please just get back to the lair.." Raph asked. April and Casey both slowly nodded, and they headed home.
April and Casey headed to another room to start looking through the book. Raph's brothers were playing video games(Leo was losing). He sat next to them and they looked over.
Leo, very clearly frustrated, asked, "Do you wanna play in the next round?" in which Raph nodded in response.