007 [completed]

Dr Brenner

I wake up in sweat. Everywhere. My clothes are drenched. I breath heavily and stand up peeling my clothes off and walking to the bathroom. I doubt Dean will be awake. It's too early for him to wake up. I turn the shower on and wait for it to warm up. I twist the lock on the door and hop into the shower. It burns my flesh but I do nothing about it. I like it that way. When I get out out the shower my skin will be red and that would be the most colour I've had in years. I shampoo my buzz cut and I see that it's growing. That's good because I didn't really like it. I gently massage my hands through my hair and rinse the foam out. I rinse my body. I press stop on the shower and I climb out. Recently I've been getting these terrible migraines. I hate it. I hâte the fact that I know I have to go back to the lab to get better. I close my eyes and my vision goes blurry. The pain gets worse and blood trickles from my nose. My vision goes black.

This is papa. Papa is causing me to feel like this. I'm back at the lab. Standing all alone in a pool of blood. Papa is the only one around me. I know this isn't real. I cannot feel the blood soaking into my skin and I cannot feel the hairs stick up on the back of my neck. This isn't real. I need one. As soon as I have him then I can leave this place behind. I won't have to see him ever again.I would not have to worry about disappointing him or ever returning. I need to leave this place. I don't belong there. He is saying something. Something I don't understand. Like when someone talks really fast in another language. He pauses. As if he asked me a question. What did he say? I need to get out of this place. I don't like it here. It isn't real. The longer I stay the more it will feel real. I concentrate. My mind fuzzes. My head is pounding as if being hit multiple times. Just like when four attacked me. « Where are you ? » papa asks. I open my mouth. I know where I am. It's an easy question. « The lab » I say. His face stays completely blank. It scares me because I don't know what's coming next. "No, where are you?" Now I know he means. Where I am in real life. In deans cabin. I open my mouth. No! I can't do this. I can't tell him. I open my mouth. I can't do this. I can't tell him where I am. If I do, this will all be over. I will go back to the lab and I would never have freedom again. I manage to close my mouth. It's harder than it seems, as I am not in control. My temperature drops. I can feel it. Resisting it feels terrible. I need to get out of here. Papa just smiles. He knows what I'm doing. "I will find you 007". I know he will. He always finds a way. I don't want him to. Suddenly I am being pushed. All my limbs collapse backwards. I am falling. I have no control over this. Suddenly I hit something. The ground. I snap back into reality. My vision is blurry and I can feel the warm trickle of blood down my nose. It'll be ok. What I need to do is find a safe date and then we can bring 092 here and it will all be over. I pull myself up and finish washing myself. I dry off with a towel and walk back to the room Dean gave me. He gave it to me. He is a great person but doing what I'm doing is not safe. I'm putting him at risk. I'm putting everyone at risk. I have to find a way to do it safely. I will find a way. The numbers always do. I smile to myself as I think this through. I can find away to get 001 back to me. We will all be safe. Once I have 001 then we can protect whoever needs to be protected. I miss 001. I hope he misses me as much as I miss him. I think of him so much it's the only reason I'm still here. I'm doing this for him. I need him back. I can't live another ten years without him. I've spent most of my childhood with him and now I've left him. I need him. Funny enough I have to admit, he's the only person I care about in my whole life. I need him and I bet 100% that he needs me too. I can get him out. I can get him out of that prison. I don't deserve to be out here without him. I rush out of the bathroom when i am changed and shake Dean awake. "come on. you need to get up" i say. He leans up and groans. He's tired. I don't care one bit if he's tired. We need to get one out. He looks at the alarm clock. "It's 2:43?! Can't we wait till morning?" He says dropping his head back on the pillow. I sigh. We can't wait till morning. Better to just get it over and done with. "No. We need to go now" I say. Silence. He's probably still asleep. He can't sleep right now. "Get up" I say pulling at his arms. I've made up my mind and I'm not taking no as an answer. "Please. I'll be good. We just need to go now." No response. He just turns his back so he is facing the wall. "Fine! I'll go by myself!" I yell walking out his room and slamming the door shut. No for the hard part. How do you open a door with a key. Jesus Christ. A normal kid would know how to do this. It's confusing. Ok I'm going to have to do this. I close my eyes and focus on concentrating. The buzz at the back of the head. I can feel it. Warm and tingly. Like pins and needles. The lock opens. I push open the door. The cold air hits me. I step onto the wooden platform. I look around. It's so quite and empty. I walk forward and shut the door. He can sleep in peace. I'll do anything to get one back. I don't have any shoes. I've never had any. But times like this my feet are wet and cold. Let's forget about feet. I need one: I start walking when I hear the door open behind me. "I'm coming" Dean says. He's dressed. I smile. Now I'm not alone. I need one. I've always need one. Times like this I don't realise how much he meant to me before. I would kill to get him back. I follow Dean to his car. Surprised that no one has seen it. They would coming looking for me. He opens the door and I sit in the seat next to him. « So where are we going? » he asks powering the car.