𝘐𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘥? DAS

CHAPTER 13

They led us to a classroom and made us stay and wait. I knew this military training was never "safe", i have this feeling that they will use us as a weapon to kill those things. Whether we like it or not.

I have my head hanging low, I can't stop thinking about the event that just happened few minutes ago. I kept blaming my self, i could've done something to prevent it. But i didn't. I let my emotion swallow me that prevent me from doing anything to save him.

I can feel pairs of eyes watching over us. Few seconds later the door slid open, but i know no one of us moved. I heard Ms. Park rushing towards us and moments later i saw her shadow towering over me.

She gently caresses my head in a sign of comfort. The gesture made me relaxed my stiff body a little bit. I looked up to her with regret, sadness, and hatred swimming in my eyes. Hatred not for her, but for the government. I can see her eyes are watering from unshed tears.

I looked away from her, afraid that i might say something i shouldn't have. She released a trembling sigh and caresses my head again. She stood up and stared at me for a second before finally making her way towards Kimchi.

I silently thanked her for not speaking, for respecting my decision to stay quiet and think for a moment.

Ms. Park kneel down beside Kimchi and looked at him with sympathy. She stood up and rushed towards Ilha, whose eyes are focused on the table he was sitting on. She stood up beside him and looked at us with sadness. Its obvious that she's mourning. She just don't want us to see her cry because we are suppose to rely on her.

Moments later she moved to seat in the middle of us three. Sge was silent for a minute then she spoke.

"Its not your fault, guys. So don't beat yourself about it. Come and talk to me when your distressed, and during class ... You know what? You should take few weeks off. What do you say?" She looked at each and every one of us. No one form the three of us said anything. Kimchi simply looked looked at her.

"Im sorry, Im also... Are you sure you're feeling ok?" She looked at each of us one by one and stopping at Ilha. Who finally looked up to her. Her eyes became unstable, she couldn't looked at our eyes before saying the words that shocked me.

"Let's tell them that, Younghoon got hurt and went home. Otherwise it'll stir them up." Because of the words that left her mouth i looked up to her harshly. I couldn't believe she would want us to lie to them, about the death of our classmates! I understand what she's trying to imply, but at the same time I don't.

"What do you mean? You really want us to lie to them? The others should be aware of the danger that the world is facing, otherwise they will continue to train playfully without really paying attention to what they are doing. They have the right to know about what the heck is happening outside these walls!" I answered her not so question and stood up from my seat. The chair made a squeak sound because of how abluntly i stood up. I walked pass her and rush outside.

As i stepped outside the classroom door, two soldier came to my view and one of them being Liutenant Lee.

I looked up to him, then to the soldier beside him and walked passed them while shaking my head, i am beyond disappointed, sad, mad and mourning.

I was about to walk pass Liutenant Lee when he grabbed my arm. I looked at him with a blank expression on my face. He didn't say anything but i can see that his eyes are holding a whole lot of words. I snatched my arm back and continued making my way to our barracks.

My feet brought me in the bathroom, in from of the mirror, not saying anything and just staring at my reflection. A single tear dropped and i was quick to wipe it away. I turned the faucet on and wash my face. Leading my both hands on the sink and staring at a running water. The event kept flashing in my mind and i don't know how to stop it. I clench my jaw and kicked the random object nearest me. Which happen to be a bucket, due to the force of my kick, a whole is created in the bucket. I released a stressed sigh, turned the faucet off and walked out of the bathroom and continued my original plan of going inside the barracks.

As i walked in the room, i saw the girls in the exact position i left them. Still in deap sleep and completely oblivious of the danger outside. I walked to my bed side and grabbed a towel to dry my face.

I lay on my bed and stared at the ceiling. Its been 3 hours and I can't feel my self getting sleepy at all. i decided to just go for a run to atleast ease my mind a little. I only went back when i noticed that the sun started rising.

_________

I entered the classroom and noticed that there are only few people here yet. I went to my seat and in my peripheral vision i saw Younghooon's chair, that will never be occupied by him ever again. I sat down on my chair and put my head on my arms.

Minutes past by and one by one they started to show up. They immediately created a circle to gossip, again.

"So the loud thuds yesterday was a shpere dropping?" So yoon asked in alarm, walking towards the group from the window.

"The guy in class 3 told me that the gym was demolished." Yeon joo replied with her arm crossed.

Kimchi who is sitting on his table beside the window glaced at the group.

"That must have been it." Soyoon said while snapping her fingers.

"If it destroyed the building, i bet the impact was huge." One of the male said.

I didn't wanna be in the conversation but they are basically surrounding me. Jangsoo who stood  beside me seems so confused, maybe he is aware that if the circumstances are different i would have said something. But its not, the event yesterday can leave my kind for some reason, its hunting me.

"Are you ok?" Jangsoo asked me, his voice is low so that he won't interrupt the conversation of the group, but enough for me to hear. His face is close to mine, especially when I turned to him nod my head and smiled at him a little. I return my face towards the group, oblivious about the fact that Youngsoo haven't moved an inch because he is flustered. He stood up straight and tried to contain his lips from moving upwards, not to mention he's ears are all red.

I noticed the groups silentness and looked at them confused. Suddenly Heerak stood up from his seat and let out a yell to scare everyone who are in deap thought. Everyone jump from his action, some even stood up from their seat in shock.

"You scared me!"

"Come on!"

"Sorry."

Joonhee stood up and slapped Heerak in the face.
"That was not funny!" She screamed at his face and walked away.

My classmates laughed at this and imitated the action when Heerak was too stun to speak.

Everyone moved back to their chairs and before Jangsoo leave my side he tapped my shoulders and gave it a gentle squeeze. I looked at him only to realize he is walking back to his chair. I looked forward and bring my hand on my shoulder, exactly when he placed his hand on. And let out a small smile. I didn't know that I needed that, it feel so genuine and gentle.