The Heart Fixers

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I felt my heart ache. Who could do that to a guy as perfect as Jake? He didn't deserve that. And depression! He was depressed! How stupid that I couldn't see past his happy facade. Had he ever let anyone see it?

"I won't say I love you, because it's too soon for that, but...I'd just like to know you. If you're scared, know that I'm scared shitless too."

Love, love, love. There was that word. LOVE. He said it. He Loved Valerie, he's thinking of Loving me in the future. How could he possibly be so casual about that word?

Love wrecks.

Case in point: Valerie and Jake. She wrecked him. Why? Because he Loved her, so she could wreck him. If he didn't Love her, what she did wouldn't matter to him as much.

"Can we be scared together, you think?" he asked.

Only one word replayed itself in my brain. Together. Together. Jake wants to be together. But isn't this going too fast? Besides...I like Sean. Don't I?

"Are you still worried this is too soon?" he asked gently and then let out a small laugh.

"Honestly, I'm not sure why I decided to tell you about Valerie. It just felt important that you knew I was as scared as you were. This is progressing a little too quick, I'll give you that, but it just feels right. To me at least. We don't have to be a couple if you're not ready for that, just...we could be friends plus a little extra," he offered and I smiled at that.

Friends plus a little extra. I could do that.

"Sure," I said, and his eyebrows shot up.

"Really?"

"Of course. And thank you...for telling me about Valerie. That took guts," I said honestly and reached out to run my fingers along his rough knuckles. He tensed slightly before relaxing under my touch.

"Is this the little extra?" he smirked at me and I smiled back.

"Yeap."

"I like you, Kendall. But I'll hold that back for now," he whispered as he leant forwards and brushed my jawline.

Dear Diary,

OH GOSH the SPARKS.

"I can't for too long though," he said teasingly as he poked my nose.

Then he pulled back unto the road and drove me home.

- - -

The next morning, I was in a rush. Like, a real rush. I was supposed to meet Sean 30 minutes ago.