911/911 Lone Star One Shots

Fever Dream

'You shouldn't have survived'

'Should've died with the rest of us, Ryder.'

'We're that easy to replace, huh? A whole new 126'

'Why do you get to have a kid when I had to leave mine behind?'

Judd woke up with a gasp, sitting straight up in bed and breathing hard. He turned to wake Grace up but found only an empty space beside him. She was working tonight, covering a night shift while someone was on vacation.

He couldn't breathe. The voices of his old 126 brothers repeated in his head. They got louder and louder, taking up all the air in the room so Judd couldn't get enough. He couldn't breathe.

Grace. He needed his Grace.

He fumbled for his phone and dialed 9-1-1.

"911, what's your emergency?" A voice came through. It wasn't Grace. Why wasn't it Grace? He needed Grace. "Hello?"

"Grace." He gasped, unable to get enough oxygen.

"Sir? Are you having trouble breathing?"

"Grace Ryder... I only talk... to Grace Ryder." He wheezed, one hand holding his chest as it ached from lack of air.

"I-okay, sir. I'll transfer you to her."

A moment later, he heard her voice. "Hello, this is Grace Ryder at 911 dispatch."

"Gracie." He whimpered, not sure when he had started crying but feeling tears on his cheeks all the same.

"Judd? What's going on, baby? What's wrong?" She asked, worry filling her voice. The few times her husband had called her at work were not joyous occasions.

"Can't- I can't breathe. They're so mad." He choked out a sob, gasping unsteadily for air.

"Honey, you can breathe. Inhale, and exhale. You can do this. We've got to slow your breathing down, love, or you're gonna hyperventilate." She coached him, recognizing the panic attack immediately. She wasn't happy it was happening, but she was slightly relieved it wasn't something life threatening.

Judd tried to take deep breaths, he really tried, but he just couldn't. Grace listened to his breathing, concerned that he was still so upset.

"Sweetheart, you said 'they're so mad.' Who's they? Who's mad?" She asked, hoping that if she got him to talk, his breathing would regulate a bit more.

"The- the old 126. The ones who didn't make it." He cried. "They're mad- they're mad at me for surviving and they're being m-mean."

"No they're not, Juddy. They're not mad at you." She assured him, wanting to go home and hug him. "Did you have a nightmare?"

"Mhm." He whimpered, taking a shaky breath before beginning to cry again. He couldn't stop himself. He didn't know what was wrong with him.

Grace considered that carefully, piecing the information together. "Judd, do you feel okay?"

Judd shook his head as he cried, forgetting that Grace couldn't see him.

"Honey, do you feel sick?" She asked again. "You usually only have real bad nightmares when you have a fever."

Judd whined. "I don't feel good, Gracie."

"Oh honey." She sighed softly. "Listen, can you go to the bathroom and take your temperature? The thermometer is in the medicine cabinet."

Judd stumbled off the bed, keeping the phone clutched close to his ear. Grace listened as he turned the light switch on and opened the medicine cabinet. A few moments later, she heard the thermometer beep.