Spencer - Secrets pt 2

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⚠️Warnings: self harm, SA⚠️

⚠️Warnings: self harm, SA⚠️

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Y/N pov

Once the jet landed, Hotch reminded me again, "you are not permitted to working on this case, y/n. Rest." I nodded.

Spencer walked behind me all the way to the SUVs, and even opened the door for me. He and I sat in the back, as JJ and Morgan sat in the front. The car ride was hauntingly quiet. It was torture. I fiddled with my hands the whole time on my lap, wincing slightly at the harsh turns or stops that occurred on some of the rough roads.

We drove straight to the department, but as I was about to get out, Spence put his hand on my thigh stopping me from leaving and Morgan and JJ walked inside the police department to introduce themselves. I grimace at the sudden pain surged through as I looked at Spencer. He pulled his hand back immediately upon noticing my flinching. "Sorry I-"

"No no it's uhm.. it's fine.." I look away quickly, then look back, "why did you stop me?" I look at him slightly tilting my head waiting for an answer in an attempt to hide the burning of the fabric touching my fresh cuts. "I wanted to drive you to the hotel, so you could rest a bit. It is what Hotch said after all.." he looks a little stressed. "Oh, yeah sure.." I grab the door and get in the passenger seat directly in front of my old seat. Spence gets in the driving seat.

The drive there was awkward to say the least. Maybe even worse than when JJ and Morgan were there. At least then they didn't push as to why I passed out.  Not even I knew why. "Y/N, I know something's wrong," he takes a deep breath, as if preparing to give someone bad news. "But I won't push. Though I want you to know you can trust me. Whatever it is, I'm here for you. The whole team is."

I couldn't help but start at my once again fiddling hands. "Yeah, I know." I whisper, holding back tears. It wasn't necessarily a moving speech, but coming from Spence, who is extremely awkward when it comes to emotional talks, it means a lot.

When we arrive at the hotel, Spence goes with me to sign the team in and get us hotel rooms. Making sure to text the team their room numbers. Once I got the keys to my room, Spence handed me my bags and left to go help the case.

I walk to the elevator.
"In maintenance, please take stairs ->"

Aww fuck- really?? I throw my go bag over my shoulder and head to the stairs. As I walk up the stairs to the 4th floor, I keep trying to push through the pain of my pants rubbing against my cut thighs. I have to take a break at floor 3, just sitting on the stairs for a bit waiting for the sting to go down. I hear footsteps as my head is in my hands against my knees, not bothering to look up at the stranger walking up the stairs. When the footsteps stop in front of me, I hear their voice, "what's a pretty lady doing sitting in a stairwell all by herself?" I look up to the man in front of me. His face wasn't attractive. He was tall, but had some weight on him, he had scruff, messy hair, but clean clothes. Even through he doused himself in axe cologne I could still smell his BO and just generally gross odor. The cologne did nothing for him. He had a fake expensive watch on, but very casual clothes- a plain light blue t-shirt and kaki long shorts with old sneakers. 

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