Pink Pansies ✺ A Pedro Pascal A.U.

Chapter 13: Not Cruelty-Free

I hadn't realized until he spoke how necessary it was for me to hear him express that of his own volition. I wasn't sure if his intuition was on point, or if I was that easy to read. I'm sure my reaction was the validation he needed to continue.

Pedro pushed himself off of the doorframe and took a few steps so he was standing behind me.

"We're both adults capable of affirmative consent," He paused as his hand came up and gently moved my curls, holding them away from one side of my face. "and there's obviously chemistry here."

I tilted my head alongside his movement, exposing my ear and neck to him. Our eyes maintained contact through the mirror. "What about your promise of nothing more?"

"Did you forget? I also said 'unless you want it'." His voice was low and I could feel his body lightly pressed against mine. "I'm not trying to convince you, just reminding you that you have a choice."

I took a deep breath and looked back at myself. My thoughts were scattered, unpredictable, and hard to articulate and intellectualize. Looking at each other in the mirror while we had this conversation created a palpable sexual tension, and even though I couldn't understand what was happening in my head, it was very clear what was happening in my body. I wanted to experience being the subject of his desire.

My gaze returned to him as he dipped his head down, whispering in my ear, "So, do you want it?"

"Will things change if I say yes?" My breath was uneven as I spoke.

"In the best way." He peered up, meeting my eyes in the reflection.

Everything about what he said turned my temperature up. His warm breath sent a tingling sensation throughout my whole body with the epicenter being the warm, wet spot between my legs. I could feel my nipples get hard under the thin cotton shirt and I fought to keep my eyelids open. If what he said was true, if things could change in a positive way, I could still be the one he'd want to surprise, the one he'd miss, the one he took to art museums and wanted to spend time with and we could make each other come...

"Then yes." I whispered, watching his movement carefully in the mirror.

Pedro's lips closed around my earlobe as his other hand found my hip. His fingers slid underneath the bottom of my shirt and gripped my hipbone as he continued to kiss and softly lick along my ear. My nipples were hard and visible and my breath audibly hitched. He smiled at that, eyes darting to our reflection.

"You're so sexy when you're turned on," He mumbled into my skin as he descended down my neck, alternating between open-mouthed kisses and small licks. "I've been wanting to see you like this since the moment we met."

Simultaneously the hand underneath my shirt moved upward but paused just below my breast, while his other hand wrapped gently around the front of my neck.

Having never watched myself in the mirror like this, I was surprised by how much I enjoyed it. I could see everything he was doing and the way my body responded to it. It gave me something to focus on so I wouldn't overthink this decision.

"Is this ok?" He asked. His movements had been slow and sensual, and in a way, I was grateful he had taken the lead.

I nodded, to which he continued and cupped my breast, pinching my nipple between his fingers.

"It feels incredible." I half moaned the words which elicited another smile from him, "don't let it get to your head."

"Can't make any promises." He replied, bringing his mouth back up to nibble my earlobe.

I whimpered and bit my lip to try and dull the sound, then I pushed my body back against his. Feeling the bulge in his pants, I began to grind against it, making him almost double over as he groaned into my skin.

"Fuck, Emi." then he twisted my nipple and caused me to falter my movements. Something between a whimper and a moan left my mouth. "I could listen to you make these sounds all day."

I had not expected this, or anything remotely like it when I walked into his apartment. Sure, the reference to carnal experiences with other men had popped into my head, but that was always rushed and messy and never really about me. This was entirely about me.

Pedro gave me a small squeeze with his hand on my neck, then used his finger to guide my face towards him. We gazed into each other's eyes and then at each other's lips. His were wet and open and I leaned into him, tongues meeting just outside of our mouths before our lips collided. Our movements were slow and rhythmic, tongues lapping against one another, alternating with his lower lip between mine and mine between his. As we continued kissing, he bit my lower lip and pulled on it slightly, offering us a brief moment afterward to gasp for air. His hand had moved away from the center of my neck so I could kiss him, but it rested along my collarbone in order to keep our bodies pressed against each other. I was grinding against him and after a while, he removed his hand from my breast and placed it back on my hipbone. His other hand dragged down the front of my body before doing the same. He pulled me into him and my hands gripped the edge of the counter. I moaned, turning my head to look at our reflection again. The area around my mouth was red and wet, cheeks flushed, eyes dark and wild. Pedro was looking at our reflection too, and leaned in, voice low as he spoke.

"Do you like watching?" He asked, still gripping my hips but slowing down.

"Yes," I answered honestly. He had unlocked something within me. My experiences prior to this didn't really rely on communication, verbal or nonverbal. It was more formulaic, and while I had almost always received praise for my part, I couldn't imagine myself going back to that form of intimacy. I only wanted this.

"I've never done this before."

"Really?" He seemed surprised, his eyes burning into mine in the reflection.

"Well, I've had sex before. This is just really hot." The words fell out of my mouth before I could stop them.

He hung his head and laughed, stopping his movement.

I laughed too, "Sorry. Did I ruin it?"

He wrapped his arms around my waist to hug me. Sprinkles of kisses along my shoulder and then up my neck, "No. I don't think anything you'd do could ruin this."

I looked at him in the mirror as his words sunk in. Did he mean this moment? Or what was brewing between us? I hoped it was the latter and felt a warmth rush over me. I took a deep breath.

Fuck. Was I starting to fall for him?

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AHHH what do you guys think?? Was it too soon for this or just the right amount of time? I also do not have a lot of experience writing smut so I hope it made sense lol. Also, this is NOT as steamy as it's going to get just fyi.

I'm sorry it's taken me so long to upload! Life is hectic. So it goes, you know? But I have this week off and even though I'll still be busy I'm hoping I can upload a couple of chapters within the next few days. I feel kind of weird about chapter 12 but it seems like some of you like it so I'll leave it alone. For now >:) 

ALSO THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 1.8 K READS AND OVER 100 VOTES!! I did NOT expect ANYONE to read my story much less look forward to new chapters! It means so much to me. I hope you continue to read and enjoy the direction I'm taking it. As always, please let me know what you think by voting or commenting ( if you feel so inclined <3 ).