Three's Company

59. Flip A Switch

He liked it since he was the same. He would often sit and watch her do her makeup in the mornings just because he wanted the extra time. So it wasn't like this was anything out of the ordinary, he worked out better when she was around.

He started up another set of fifty again. "I know I said I wouldn't be getting on the pill and I still stand by my point, but I was thinking that... I don't want to have a baby if I'm not married. You know I wouldn't want that, what would my parents say?"

Heath straightened up in a sudden move, causing her to bounce a little as he pulled up. "We'll... get... married again." He managed to grunt out. "Hell, I'll get married again today if that's what you want."

"But then it's not sincere. I want that only to happen when the moment is right. Like when you proposed all those years ago, I had no idea and it made the moment so special. I don't want to ruin that first moment for us because it was perfect."

"Baby..." another pushup, then he went down again. "Just think of it as a part of our story. Besides, I'm pretty sure divorcing and getting married to the same person again doesn't count. Everyone still thinks the people were always married if that happens."

"You don't get it. Of course, you don't."

He cut his workout short, dropping onto the ground and letting her get off him. He then turned onto his back, sucking in long deep breaths through his open mouth.

She looked at his handsome features before she reached out to grab his water bottle. Uncapping the lid, she passed it over to him, watching him drink it in slow takes.

"Let me try to explain what I do get then." His throat bobbed as he swallowed another gulp of water. "you don't want us to use any protection but you also don't want to have a baby unless we get married again. And you won't let me marry you because it's already happened and you don't want to do it again. Yeah?"

Mona cocked her head to the side, going over his analysis. "Precisely."

He gave her an incredulous look, putting the water down by his side and raising on his forearms. He was face to face with her, able to see every part of her.

"You don't think that shit sounds confusing to a guy?"

"What's confusing about it?" She muttered. It sounded as simple as it was, did it not?

"Habibti, if I can't marry you, then how do you expect us to progress? You wanna stay single forever? Or do you not want to have children with me anymore, is that it? You want this to end, for good?"

She lifted herself off the ground, causing him to copy her. He picked up his water bottle from the ground as Otto ran between them, trying to follow after them.

Her silence spoke volumes and he tried not to react too brashly. "I can't read your mind, Mo."

She went to the light switch, taking one last look at the room before she ushered the dog over to her. She switched the light off before making her way down the hall and up the stairs.

"I'm not asking you to read my mind." She said, not bothering to turn around.

She wasn't annoyed at him, more so at herself for not being able to communicate what she wanted to say. "I'm not getting any younger, Heath. I want kids."

"And what's stopping you exactly? You know I want kids too."

He caught up to her in time, reaching the top step and catching her wrist. Turning her around, he looked down at her. "Talk to me. Tell me what I'm not understanding, I promise, I'll try to get it right this time."

She relaxed her shoulders, the effects of her sleep deprivation catching up to her limbs.

Her eyes landed on the ink across his chest, she gazed over the one tattoo she loved the most and her apprehension seemed to lessen.

"I want kids. I want to be married. I want the whole domesticated partnership of a mother and a father being in love and their kids to be a product of that love. I want real love."

Heath was certain there was moisture building up behind his eyes, blinking at the realisation. It sunk so deep he nearly became blindsided by the intensity.

He came to the very conclusion she couldn't say out loud.

"You don't love me anymore."

It wasn't said as a question, more so a strong statement.

Mona's heart ripped out of her chest as her bottom lip quivered up. She was left to reach her hand up and stroke it against the word written across his skin.

Hayati.

My life. She was his whole life, that wasn't something that needed to be debated. She knew she was his life.

It hurt so bad, wondering if that is how she still felt about him.

Ten years. Ten whole years of him. He was all she knew and she wasn't sure if she could go through another ten years.

Did she even know how to live without him?

"I-I don't know."