During your life you went through stressful day after stressful day with your job and your bastard of a boss. during one night a meteor crashed near Y/N's House and when he checked the crashsite a being from another world paired with the boy and af...
The Prince was in the bath while speaking to his darling blitzy soothing his spirit as he gazed at his curtains which looked like the night sky.
Stolas: Mmmm when isn't it a bad time blitzy?
Blitzo: What is it?
Stolas: I've been meaning to follow up on our last conversation regarding my grimoire.
Blitzo: What did you just call me?!
Stolas: my book blitzy the book I was given to do my job? That I've allowed you to use to do yours?
Martha: I can hear you darling!
Blitzo: Shiiit!
Stolas: Anywhooo I've have been thinking you know I've been permitting you access to the mortal realm less then legally for quite some time now but I do need the grimoire back to fulfil my duties. I was thinking what if we worked out some kind of exchange? Favours for Favours? Doesn't that sound enticing?
Blitzo: You gotta stop using your fancy rich people talk okay? I'm trying to concentrate on not getting fucked in my AH!
Blitzo screamed when a bullet hit the tree he was hiding behind.
Stolas: Then let me keep it simple once a month on a full moon you return the book to me followed by a night of paaaaaaaaassionate fornication aaaaaand you get to keep it all the rest of the time. Sound fair my little imp?
Blitzo: Fine whatever!
Stolas: ohh Blitzo I'm so excited! I cannot wait to feel your slimy **** inside of my **** to **** my-
As stolas rants on about his desires Martha pinned blitzo with the butt of her gun.
Martha: gotcha! So you're a little devil huh? Come to drag me and my kin down to hell? Well not today Satan! I'm gonna send yall back where ya came from!
Martha drags blitzo out to a clearing and puts him on a stake ready to burn the imp to death.
Martha: Satan we return your filthy creatures back into the pits of hell! May the root of evil remain honoured as we continue thy work.
Martha throws the torch onto the stake covering blitzo in flames as she laughs like a madman but blitzo remained unphased.
Blitzo: Yeah that's not how it works lady your fire doesn't actually hurt me. But I mean I could fake it if it makes your dick hard.
Martha: Oh......shit. Well I'll just shoot ya in your smart-ass mouth!
Martha loads up her shotgun and points it at blitzo.
Blitzo: That would be more effective.
Before Martha could take her shot a roar erupted from nearby and the monster emerged from the bushes carrying the decapitated head of Martha's son.
Blitzo: What the actual fuck is that?!
Martha: MY BABY YOU FUCKING MONSTER I'LL KILL YA!
Martha charges at the monster which roars at the mother pointing its sharp tendrils towards her.
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While Martha was focused on the monster millie and moxxie had arrived to help blitzo. After they cut blitzo free they focused on the creature as it pushed aside Martha like nothing it snapped her gun broke her jaw and ripped off her left arm.
Martha: NO I AINT GOING YET NOT UNTIL I AVENGE MY CHILD!
Sick of this women's Bullshit the monster waited for Martha to get close enough and when she closed the distance and jumped up ready to bring her machete down the monster quickly grabbed her head and snapped her neck with such strength it twisted her head to face her back. The monster stood there letting the body collapse as it coughed up blood before falling down limp and lifeless
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The monster let out a victory roar and ran into the forest while the three imps stood there trying to figure out what the fuck just happened.
Moxxie: What......was that thing?
Blitzo: No fucking idea I'm just glad it didn't want to fuck with us so let's get out of here before it comes back and changes its mind.
Millie: I'll go......grab Y/N's body.
Moxxie: Dammit I got Y/N killed I was too soft and got him killed!
Blitzo: Enough moxxie let's just get back but I'll give you one warning. If you ever pull a stunt like this again I will fuck you and your wife.
The three began to walk to the place where Y/N's body was but when they got there to everyone's surprise Y/N was alive sitting down holding his chest with his shirt ripped off.
Millie: Y/N!
Blitzo: No fucking way.
Millie immediately ran up to Y/N and hugged him.
Millie: You're alive your actually alive thank god!
Y/N: Yep I'm still kicking.
Moxxie: How? We saw you take a shot to the chest.
Y/N: Then I'm lucky that the bitch had a bad aim. I eased the blood loss so I'll pull through but moxxie if you do something like that again I will shove that gun up your ass and pull the trigger is that clear?!
Moxxie: Yeah I'm sorry I promise I won't be so soft in the future.
Y/N: Good then let's get back I need to crack open a cold one.
Blitzo: I'm with you there Y/N.
Timeskip
The gang was celebrating the job's success with a banner over them which read "killed the bitch" while they all had some cake while loona gawked at the shirtless Y/N.
Loona: Mmmm those abs momma like (wags tail)
Y/N: So you guys are telling me that this creature just came in and fucked up the place?
Millie: You should have seen it Y/N it was unstoppable!
Moxxie: Thank god it didn't attack us.
Blitzo: Why didn't it attack us? Got no damn clue but forget it the bitch is dead so we get paid.
Millie: Yeah let's fucking party!
Y/N: let's get fucking wasted!
Carnage: Soooo when are you gonna tell them?
Y/N: (soon carnage just waiting for the right moment)
Carnage: Nervous about them finding out?
Y/N: (abit yeah but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.)
