Linda was smart-- she always had been. She always wanted to know more about the world around her; she was always immersed in a book, learning about a historical world. Despite being smart, she was still gullible. She still believed in people, that they were generally good. She believed this, despite having two very good cases against it. She believed it, because the bad people in her books were fictional, so surely they were being played up for dramatics?
Now here she sat at the kitchen table on a Saturday morning reading Rebecca for the third time. She was ignoring her brother and older sister, which she was getting increasingly good at.
"Did Dad skip out on us again?" Wendy sighed, looking in the fridge for some fruit.
"Yup," Jimmy confirmed around a mouthful of sugary cereal. It was his second bowl.
"Where's Mom?"
"Aunt Frida's," Linda answered almost monotonously, too wrapped up with Rebecca and her tragic life to think about her own.
"Who the hell is Aunt Frida anyways?" Jimmy loudly wondered, and maybe Linda couldn't read here. "I've never even heard of her."
"That's because it's code," Wendy plopped onto a chair with her glass of Orange juice.
"Code? Oh you mean she's f***ing a guy behind Dad's back."
Linda looked up, "what?"
"Only because Dad's f***ing his secretary," Wendy answered. It was ironic, Linda thought, that such nasty words could come out of someone so priss and pretty.
"What?" She asked again.
"Oh come on, Linda. I'm sure in those books of yours, people cheat all the time!"
"Well, yeah, but—"
"Everybody does it."
"Speaking from experience, sis?" Jimmy asked with a knowing smile before Wendy wiped it off with a slug to his arm.
"You're eleven- You're supposed to be observant."
"I thought he had business," Linda started only for her siblings to laugh.
"Sweet, naive, gullible little Linda," Wendy started and Linda's blood boiled. "Life is more like those books than you think it is. Dad's a dirty rotten cheater, and so is Mom."
"Dad started it though," Jimmy gestured with his spoon. "You should've been here when Mom found out. You ever wonder why she drinks? It's because of Dad."
"And Dad drinks because of Mom. Except Dad's a fundamentally awful person; Mom isn't. Drink makes her that way."
Linda wondered how her siblings knew all this. "Are you sure about that?"
"It's just a matter of time before shit hits the fan and life as we know it falls apart around us."
She furrowed her brows, suddenly not hungry anymore. "I'm going to read upstairs," she said almost sadly.
Wendy and Jimmy watched as she walked away, her movements sluggish. Jimmy frowned, "do you think we should've told her better?"
Wendy shook her head, "she had to learn. Poor thing still doesn't know not to talk back to Dad."
"She's just a fighter. You know, one of those ralliers. Standing up for what's right."
"That's going to get her in trouble one day."
************
A week. It took a week to know for certain that her father was really gone. That they had skipped separating and trying for the sake of their children. He was truly and completely gone, and that was that. One day his clothes and things were all gone, never to be seen again.
It was two thirty in the morning, and Linda had to get up for school in a few hours. She was going to be a total zombie by the time her alarm rang. She was still wide awwake, and unfortunatelt, the desperate and quite comical attempte of Levin to woo Kitty wasn't helping her fall asleep. Having giving up on sleep entirely, she book marked her page and set the novel down. Her grandmother always made her tea when she couldn't sleep, so she thought she'd try it.
Quietly Linda mde her way down to th kitchen, very surprised to see her mother at the table.
"Linda," Marni started, and she sounded tired. So damn tired. "What are you doing up?"
"I was going to make some tea; I can't sleep." While Linda was certain her mother didn't love her like a mother should, she knew Marni was more loving when Tony wasn't around. Maybe having him gone would actually be a good thing? Maybe she'd finally stop drinking and get her life together. Or was the damage already done and beyond repair?
Things were quiet as Linda made her tea. She poured it in a thermos to drink in bed when she said, "do you want some? There's a few more packets."
"No."
"Okay..." she licked her lips, wanting to say something but not quite sure how to say it. Finally, looking into her tea, she settled on, "I'm sorry that Daddy did those things to you."
"Your father is an asshole," Marni responded dismissively.
"I know he is. But no one deserves to be treated that way. I'm sorry he wasn't your prince charming."
Marni looked at her daughter, awestruck. "Do you forgive the bastard?"
She shook her head. "Maybe some day, when I'm married and have kids. But not today."
She just nodded, looking into her empty glass but not making an effort to refill it.
"Are you okay, Mama? I mean really okay?"
"How are you like this? How did you turn out this way? We've been truly awful to you."
Linda shrugged, looking into her thermos again. "Nonna hasn't, and my friends are really nice. Jimmy is nice too... most of the time."
Marni sighed, "I've been such a crappy mother to you."
Linda sat at the table with her thermos. Slowly, she said, "I'm only sixteen. There's a lot of time between now and when one of us dies."
Marni looked at her daughter, still shocked. How did Linda end up this way? Usually kids from a broken home like theirs end up in jail, they get int drugd, they just generally ruin their lives. But not her daughter apparently. Her daughter had something in her, a spark of some kind, or a need maybe.
The mother swallowed and stood, "come here."
Linda did so, her heart pounding in her ears. Was she in trouble?
But much to her surprise, Marni hugged her. And started to cry.
"I'm so sorry, sweet girl. I'm so sorry."
She hugged her tightly, "it's okay, Mama."
Was this a glimmer of hope? A glimpse into the future? Linda sure as hell hoped so.
