my worth || j.o

liar, ayala

imani jyne

i laid sprawled across my queen sized bed with a stuffy nose and a sore throat, i'd been sick for about three days and it's really been taking a toll on me. just then my phone began to ring snapping me out of my thoughts and i picked it up knowing it was only jahseh.

"hey bae, you feeling any better?" he asked, i hear shuffles in the background letting me know that he was doing something "no, it still hurts" i let out in a groan "aww my lil shorty it's gonna be okay, ima bring by some stuff later on so i can take care of you" he said making me frown a little "no, i'm sick and i don't want you to get sick too" i said, coughing a bit "i don't give a fuck imani, i'm your boyfriend i'm gonna be there for you" he said stubbornly letting me know that i didn't have a say so "okay jah, i'll see you when you get here" i said before hanging up the phone.

yes, the night of our date jahseh asked me to be his girlfriend and there was absolutely no way that i was saying no, we've been dating for only a week and a half now and it was pretty great for the most part. jahseh was just so clingy no matter what, even when i'm as sick as a dog he chooses to come be all up under me likely to get sick himself, it's cute but sometimes it can be a little overbearing.

sooner or later i hear my front door opening letting me know that jahseh was now here, i hear his footsteps get closer and he pops his head in my door and makes a silly face which despite me being sick made me giggle. he fully enters with bags galore in his hands, setting them down and plopping his fat ass next to me. "come here i missed you" he pulled me on top of him and wrapped his arms around me, kissing my forehead several times "jah, i feel and look like shit" i groaned "stop it, we only speak positive about ourselves" "you're fucking gorgeous" he said making me smile. his phone dinged and he picked it up to check it out, as he read the message his face dropped.

"i gotta go bae, some important shit just came up" "i'll be back tho" he said, as he began to gather his things in a hurry "what happened?" i asked, concerned "don't worry about it baby, just know that i'll be back" he said firmly then left without another word. i only wondered what happened and hoped that it wasn't fatal to anybody, jah has never just left me hanging like that without information. i'd been occupying myself with the stuff jahseh had brought to me in the meantime when i suddenly got a call and picked it up without even looking.

"hell-" i began, but quieted once i heard talking "she let you get away from her that easily?" i heard a females voice ask "tahaha, yeah but let's not talk about her right now" i heard jah say and i felt my heart physically shatter. i couldn't feel my face as i continued to listen to jahseh and this girl "you know you still love me i don't know why you're even with her, having us sneak around" she said in a snarky tone "i'm sorry ayala, i do love you but she was there for me when i needed some somebody" he said making me furrow my eyebrows, i was a rebound.

i quickly hung up the phone, i couldn't believe that i was being played like this and it was only the second week of us being together. but i wasn't stupid enough to let it keep happening so i blocked his number and began to gather some of his belongings that he'd left around my place, with tears threatening yo fall down i packed them up and went to the door to leave them in the hallway for him. i opened the door and pushed the box across the hall to his door and quickly went back into my apartment and closed the door making sure to lock it.

i was left speechless and honestly heart broken that words like that could spill from his lips after all the great things he's said to me, he was such a manipulator and i'd fallen for his act, but i wasn't about to be nobodies second choice. despite being sick i figured that i could get my mind off of things by going out and making some money, i haven't been able to do it as much with jahseh constantly on my back because i didn't want him knowing anything of what i was doing.

i got dressed and scouted for my next victim, once i found a guy he sent me his address and it was go time. i walked until i made it to his middle class-like home in broward and knocked on the door, he quickly opened the door and guided me in without a word. "how you doing lovely?" he said smiling "i'm good" i said with a small giggle "you look so gorgeous this evening" he said, making me flash a fake smile.

an hour later

the man sat gagged and tied up in one of his dining room chairs as i stuffed as many valuables and cash as i could into my duffel bag, he frantically squirmed and struggled as i flashed him a small smile and rushed out of the door, turning as many corners as i could just incase he'd freed himself and was looking for me. once i felt i was in the clear i trotted my way back to my apartment complex satisfied with today's mission.

i rushed back up to my apartment as i was still sick and wanted to lay down and get a bit of rest, as i made it to my floor i saw jahseh sitting outside of my door with angry expression on his face, now if i knew any better which i clearly don't i would've just turned around right then and there but i was already here and i knew i had to face this eventually.

"mani where the fuck were you?" he asked through gritted teeth as i walked up "minding my damn business jah, why?" "i should be asking where the fuck you were, or better yet if you had fun with ayala" i scoffed, shoving him aside and pulling out my keys so that i could unlock my door. he grabbed both of my arms and shoved me against the wall, holding me down as i frantically squirmed to get out of his grasp, ironic isn't it? "yo, get the fuck off of me jahseh!" i semi-shouted.

"i don't know what the fuck you heard but it's not like that, g shit" he said, trying to make eye contact with me but my eyes wandered, trying their best not to meet his sweet gaze. "let me go and go home jahseh, this isn't happening any fucking more" i snatched my wrists from his tight grasp and continued to open my door before walking in, but not without jahseh bursting through the door after me "imani, it was a mistake" he said as he followed me through the livingroom and into my bedroom.

i roll my eyes at his pathetic attempt to fix things "i'm sick, i want to sleep and i want you out of my life" i said with a sigh "we both know you don't want that" he shook his head, delusional. "please just get out i don't have time for this, you love her so go be with her" i shrugged "i love you, imani" "i'm sorry" he said with pleading eyes as i through my duffel bag on the floor and crawled into bed "you don't love me you love the attention that i give you, ayala must be your true love so you and her can go kick rocks" i scoffed as i got up and began pushing him towards the door "you're gonna regret this imani, g shit" "all i've done was be here for you" he said with the angriest face i'd seen "i don't regret anything but wasting my time on you, jahseh" i said, finally shoving him out of the door and locking it.

i let out a deep sigh and made my way back to my bedroom, finally being able to wind down and suddenly the tears started and wouldn't dare to stop. my chest hurt so badly as i thought about all that i'd endured in my life and how i finally though i'd found somebody who actually gave a shit about me, it felt like a knife to the chest because i now knew that i was wrong.