Cruelty | Shoto Todoroki

sixty two

I sat in the dorms waiting for Aizawa to bring Eri so Midoriya and I could show her around. We had arranged for her to tour the school so she doesn't get scared when she comes for the sports festival.

It was my plan to make her smile. Even if it happens for a split second, I'll take any sign of happiness I can get. She was young and in so much pain, it pained me to see her reap the same lonesome feeling I'd felt at her age.

I learnt from a young age that emotion got you killed, love got you killed. So I didn't show any but boy did I yearn for it. I yearned for it so deeply it was all I could see. Recognition. Hope. Validation. I lived to chase it.

I watched as Eri walked into the common room with Aizawa, her small hand in his bigger one. Her wonderous eyes traveled around the room before they landed on Midoriya and I.

Smiling, I listened as Aizawa spoke, "You have the go ahead to show her around. I have a prior commitment so I won't be joining you." Eri walked over and I dropped to my knees to give her a hug.

She hesitated at first, but then she let me hug her. I held onto her, wishing to lift the troubles and fears from her shoulders. She was relieved to be free but she was still scared, so so scared.

"Are you excited to tour our school?" Midoriya smiled at her as he picked her up. She nodded a little and I let a smile touch my lips as I watched Midoriya tuck a strand of her hair behind her ear.

I suggested we show her the main campus and then we can end the tour back here, Midoriya agreeing with me. We spent the rest of the morning showing her around the U.A grounds and when it hit lunch, we sat in the empty lunch hall and ate some food.

"So what do you think, Eri?" The small girl picked at her food and gave Midoriya a shrug. "It's really nice." She muttered making me eye her for a second. She's let her walls down around us but still, she hadn't smiled.

The air was tense as we ate, Midoriya's mind racing. "She needs time, Midoriya." He jumped a slight bit, surprise lining his face at the suddenness of my voice in his head.

I didn't blame him. "I know, it hurts to see her like this, though." I'd never agreed with something more. It did hurt. It hurt so much, everytime I looked at her, it was as if she were a mirror of my younger self.

As a child, I felt vulnerable—in a way I still do—but at the young age of six, I was wide-eyed and scared. Just like her, I wore my heart on my sleeve but that was until I was nine.

With Tomura around, I wasn't wide-eyed but simply scared. Scared of him. Scared of the world. Scared of myself. It wasn't until recently that I had been able to laugh and smile.

It wasn't until Shoto that I had been happy.

Eri peered up at me from Midoriya's lap and she looked hesitant. Like whatever she wanted go say got caught in her throat. I gave her time to speak and when she did, I listened attentively.

"Ikari, why did he hurt me? Why did he kill me so much?" My heart cracked into two shattered pieces. She looked so lost, so confused. She looked so much like me.

Midoriya bit his lip as he placed his fork down, his brows furrowing. It was me he looked at, he expected my answer and I tried to pull myself together to answer her.

"He hurt you because he was selfish and a terrible person." I moved my lunch tray away from me and placed my arms onto the table, reaching one up to fiddle with my golden necklace.

I focused on the table infront of me, "Some people are evil, Eri. They're cruel without reason and hurting others fills the void in their being. "

"Because people who hurt innocent children don't have souls," I dont have a soul, "They have no reason to hurt people and you don't need to find a reason to excuse their behavior."