Ruhani ~ The Language Of Love

EPILOGUE

I stepped forward to hug myself. I did not know but coming here back unknowingly triggered all the memories that I was trying hard to forget. 

During the travelling and at Maamujaan's home, I did not remember anything. But, as soon as I entered our chamber, the bed, the same furniture and everything just reminded me of my loss.

I looked at Aahil, who removed his overcoat and sat on the couch. 

My hand unknowingly touched my stomach and I inhaled a sharp breath.

He looked at me and might have understood as he came forward and collected me into a hug. I hugged him back and immediately felt better.

"You must be feeling tired,"

He said and I nodded releasing the hug.

"Yes, but, I badly need to take a bath,"

He nodded.

"Together?"

He asked with a slight smirk and I smiled nodding lightly.

We both walked towards the Hammam and undressed before stepping into the pool of cold water. 

He sat against the wall and I sat beside him. He held my hand and intertwined our fingers. I tilted my head against his bicep and we sat there without any talks and in utter peace just enjoying ourselves.

My mind unknowingly recalled all our memories from starting to till now. How we got married, how we saw each other, the life when I was not able to talk, his life, the way he changed himself, the way I changed myself and everything that happened. And, still, we were together. Us against all the odds.

And, there was one thing that I realised.

All my life, I believed that Love was a specifically dedicated feeling towards someone, only one, someone I believed to be a man, a husband, or my lover. I believed that this hollowness in me would be sewn with the presence of that someone special. But, those seven months that I spent without him, alone, made me question my fifteen years of belief.

And, I concluded that it was never true completely. Spending my time with people from different backgrounds brought me a different perspective in front of me. That love was not an individual dedicated feeling. It was as true as the presence of God. It was neither tangible nor inexistent. Rather, it is the only thing that was selflessly present in all beings. In us, in those trees, in mother earth, in the universe. It flows from that one true self and humanity was its carriage. Humanity.

What I understood after spending my time with the local people, attendees, low ranks, maids and people around me was that what I knew about love was so rigid and dedicated. But, Love had never been so rigid and dedicated, rather it was an emotion that flows. For some, we have more of these emotions and for some, we have less of these emotions. For some, we have this emotion with respect. Like towards our parents. With some, we have this emotion with desires, respect, trust, and expectations. Like towards our partners. With some, we have this emotion of only forgiving. Like, helping other humans.

But, this emotion has always been intact and present. 

I always felt that my definition of love was correct, my love for him was pure, big and real. And, when I was mute, I always thought that I needed love. I needed someone that would give me sympathy, understand me, stand beside me, hold me, make me feel loved because I love him. But, when I met him, knew about him. All my beliefs were challenged.

All my life, I thought, I was at the biggest loss, because I could not speak. I needed love, I needed support, I needed people to cheer me up. But, in all these, I never understood that other people could need all these things even more than I did. Meeting him, I realised, my loss was not the biggest one. Spending time with the people, attendees and maids, knowing about their lives, I realized it was not me that needed the love the most. After meeting him, I realised that what we expect, the other person also expects that from us. And, this is the biggest thing we misunderstand, mostly. Our love towards ourselves is the first love we should have but when it grips around selfishness even a bit of it, it makes us feel like we need love the most. We forget that we are the carrier of these emotions. As we take it, we need to pass it on too. We cannot digest it all. And, this is not a job but a moral value that people should have. The more you share it, the more you would feel loved. The more you crave it like begging, the more you would get suffocated. Because, you are a carrier, not an absorber.

And, since then I just started sharing my love with all the people. But, for my parents, it was a little more respectful and to my husband, it was garnished with some sexual desires and expectations. But, the emotion was the same. True love does not happen only to one. It is present in all of us and we all can love all. Simply. And, it is your choice as to who you would like to love a little extra and which other emotion like respect, sensuality, friendly etc.

"Ruhani, I love you so much. Thank you so much for coming into my life,"

He said and I lifted my gaze to look at him.

I shifted a little closer to him, sitting on his lap and cupped his cheek.

"Thank YOU for coming into my life and making me feel better this way,"

I leaned in closer and kissed his cheek.

"I love you too, Sultan Aahil Aashiq Ibrahim Khan. The way you are, the way you were and the way you will be,"

He hugged me and we kept sitting there till now.

The love that bloomed between us even before we understood what love actually was, was the beautiful emotion that we both lived.

But, now it was better because now I knew how to cope with the ups and downs of life. And, we intend to go through them forever.

No, we did not live happily ever after because that never happens. Life is full of ups and down and there was someone who was yet to enter our lives.

Rahil and Rida.

THE LAST UPDATE FOR RUHANI ~ THE LANGUAGE OF LOVE!

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ALSO, THE BOOK IS ALREADY 86 CHAPTERS LONG, SO ITS BEST WE END IT HERE. I WILL UPDATE THE BONUS CHAPTERS, ONCE I OUTLINE THE TIMELINE WITH HAIDER, RAHIL, RIDA AND OTHER STORIES 

I HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT TO THE FULLEST. IT WAS A REALLY MATURE BOOK, NOT BECAUSE OF THE SEXUAL CONTENT BUT BECAUSE OF THE ISSUES FACED BY THE COUPLE. AND, I AGREE IT MIGHT HAVE NOT MET THE EXPECTATIONS OF A FEW OF YOU BUT FOR ME, THIS IS MY BEST BOOK. I WORKED HARD TO WRITE IT, THE HARDEST BECAUSE HALF OF THE BOOK, RUHANI DID NOT SPEAK AND WRITING A BOOK WITHOUT DIALOGUE IS LIKE BAKING A CAKE WITHOUT FLOUR (IF IT MAKES SENSE)

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