Chapter 26

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Honesty is the best policy.

They sat on edge of the bed, eating their sandwiches with great succession.

"So where have you been?" She asked quietly. Derek frowned. "Mark didn't tell you?" He asked. She shook her head. He sighed, no wonder she hadn't come looking for him. "I went to D.C" he said. She raised her eyebrows. "You took the job?" She asked, surprised. He nodded. "It's a really great project" he said, trying to not show my emotion.

"Oh- well that's good- not that you left me- but- that you're happy" she said nervously. He shook his head. "Not happy, not without you" he said.

"But you left. You vanished. You didn't return my calls or anything"

"I was hurt"

She paused, trying not to get angry.

"We're you angry I got chief?" She asked. He shook his head.

"No, I was happy for you" he said

"It didn't feel like it" she shrugged as she picked at her fingers. He sighed, tugging on his hair.

"I wanted you to get the job, ask Lexie. I said that if I'd have got the job, I'd have give it to you. I wanted you to have it. I wanted D.C, I just-"

"What?" She asked quietly.

"I didn't want to leave you. I'd have settled for just a neurosurgeon if it meant we could still be together. A-and then you lied and I didn't see a point, it felt like there was no us. So I went to D.C"

"Do you like it there?" She asked quietly. He just shrugged. "It's a good project, I love it, but I only love the job, not the place, it's pretty lonely" he explained. She nodded.

"I didn't lie, I just didn't tell the truth" she sighed. "What truth? None of this is making sense" he sighed. She looked down at her hands, fiddling with her fingers.

"I've never told anyone about this, not even Lexie or Izzie" she said quietly. He grabbed her hand. "You can trust me" he smiled at her. She nodded. "I know I can, I love you" she whispered as tears filled her eyes. He squeezed her hands.

"My mom's Ellis Grey, the surgeon" she said quietly. "She taught me my intern year. I remember her" Derek said. Meredith looked to him. "What did you think of her?" Meredith asked curiously. "Honestly? Scary, rude, scary, strict, did I mention scary?" He joked which made her laugh. "Yeah, that's her" she giggled.

"Is she a good mom?" He asked curiously. "No. She never has been" Meredith said quietly. "She left me on my own after my dad left. I was only 5" she shrugged. "It sounds like you had a terrible childhood" he looked to her. She nodded slowly.

"My mom and Richard had an affair that broke up my parents marriage. Then Richard went back to his wife and left me and my mom alone. After that..." she paused for a moment as she rested her elbows on her knees. "It's okay, Meredith. You can talk to me about it" he said as he rubbed her back.

"Derek, my mother slit her wrists in front of me when I was five years old. It's never okay to talk about it" she said suddenly. There, the secrets out.

"Meredith-" he looked to her in shock. "I tried calling the ambulance but she told me not to. I waited until she passed out and then I called 911" she continued to explain. "After that I pretty much raised myself. She had some sort of resentment towards me, like I got in the way of her career. Surgery was her life, and I was just a girl who needed a family"

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