No where to hide (SEQUEL TO POSSESSIVE) (Punk Michael Clifford fanfic)

Chapter 50

~ Ryder's P.O.V ~

"I love you." Ashton whispered as he kissed my lips. I reluctantly kissed back as he pulled me into his lap. On some level I feel bad for Ashton, I understand that he wants love but he's trying to get it from the wrong person.

There was a time when I did love him but that time was so long ago. I miss the old Ashton that was always giggling and caring. The only that always tried to make me smile when I was sad, the one that never judged me even though he had the right. He was different, I was different. I guess these five years really did change everyone, some for the better and some for the worst.

I realize now that I'm the only reason my life has been so chaotic. I've been so reckless when it came to the things around me. I never cared about anyone's feelings but my own. I guess that's why Ashton is the way he is. Maybe if I actually considered his feelings he would still be the guy I left in Australia and not some heartless bastard.

I hate myself for all the Shit I've done. I ruined Calum and Michael's friendship, I hurt people, but the thing I hate myself the most for is the fact that I couldn't protect Adam from Ashton.

I was so caught up in my own train of thought that I didn't realize that Ashton was trying to talk to me until a frown formed on his perfect face.

"What?" I asked pulling my hair into a ponytail.

"What are you thinking about because you obviously weren't listening to me." He said with an adorable pout causing me to smile at how cute he looks.

"You." He raised an eyebrow

"What about me?" I let out a sigh before speaking

"The way you use to be. I miss it, you were always the one I would go to when I had a problem or when I needed someone to be there for me. There was a time when I thought I loved you more than Calum and Michael and considered being with you. But at that time you weren't mine you were Eliana's and we were just friends, we didn't kiss and we didn't Fuck. Just friends that were there for each other and never judged each other. You want to know the reason why I never really wanted to be with you?" I asked causing Ashton to nod signaling for me to continue. "Because even when you claimed to be done with Eliana you never were. I saw the pain in your eyes when Luke kissed her when we were training to get our babies back from your old boss. The only reason I didn't get pissed off and jealous is because I understood what you felt. You loved me but you couldn't get over the person you loved first. Even though you tried to convince yourself that you didn't love her anymore and that you just loved me you knew it wasn't true, I knew it wasn't true. I don't like to share, not with Eliana, not with anybody, that's why I couldn't love you the way you loved me, because I wasn't willing to share your love with anyone. But those five years changed you, you're not the same guy you use to be. I can tell that you don't love Eliana anymore and that you love me but the problem with that is that I let you go, I think it's time that you let me go." I said now stroking Ashton's hair.

"I can't." He whispered "I've tried to let you go for five years but I can't. I've tried everything but nothing seemed to work. I don't know what it is about you that makes me feel like I can't live without you. You made me feel like I could actually be loved. Even when I was with Eliana I was always her second choice, never her main priority. But when I was with you, you made me feel like I was the only guy in the world that you actually cared about. Like It was only you and me no one else. Every time I needed you, you were there." He took a deep breath before speaking. "The night you left with Calum broke me. That night I was going to ask you to runaway with me but when I walked in your room and saw that you and your things were gone I broke down. I loved you so much and the fact that you ranaway with Calum hurt me. The reason I told Michael the first time that you tried to runaway was because I couldn't picture my life without you in it. I was planning on proposing to you and buying a house for us." He said with tears running down his face. I used the pad of my thumb to wipe away his tears before pulling him into a tight hug.

"I'm sorry, I didn't realize me leaving would hurt you so bad." I truthfully stated.

"Do you want to leave?" Ashton asked taking me by surprise

"Yes." I sighed " I miss my kids, Ashton." I truthfully stated

"What if I brought them here? Then would you want to stay?" His blood shot eyes stared into mine

"Even if you did bring them here you would be taking them away from their fathers and that isn't fair to them." Ashton nodded in understatement. Ashton lifted me off his lap and sat me down beside him.

"I'll be right back, I need to use the bathroom." With that Ashton stood to his feet and made his way to the bathroom. I let out a sigh before throwing my head back in exhaustion.

I sat on the couch for a good minute before there was a tapping sound on the window. I let out an annoyed sigh before walking over to the window to see what was making the sound. I rolled my eyes in annoyance when I realized it was just a tree branch hitting the window. I was about to close the window but a hand covering my mouth causing me to scream into the person's hand.

I hit the person in the crotch causing them to let out a pained groan and release me. I quickly turned around to see Calum laying on the floor in a ball holding his crotch in pain. Quickly rushed over to him and pulled him into a hug

"Oh my gosh Calum I am so sorry I didn't know it was you. Why would you sneak up behind me and cover my mouth? How did you know where I was?" I said in a low tone so that Ashton wouldn't hear me.

"Because I didn't want you to make a sound, I didn't want Ashton to know that we are here. Michael tracked your phone" He said hugging me so tight that I couldn't breath. I nodded in understanding before standing to my feet.

"We need to go before Ashton gets out of the bathroom." Calum nodded in agreement before pressing a hard passionate kiss to my lips before pulling me towards the front door. I quietly opened the door and was about to step out before a voice stopped me dead in my tracks.

"Where do you think you're going?"