These Glass Hearts of Ours

Part 1

I remember the first time I noticed my interests growing on him like how wisteria would grow on my naked heart to always remind me with the tingling. My eyes would always follow him, and my whole city would be in blue if he did not come to the club on Mondays. I loved my own feeling of jealousy when a friend of mine would always be with him—the place I wanted to be with all my heart.

Miko has been the second person I have befriended since arriving in this new town, and joined a club of this town's teens' interests, where we just gather to be saved from the boredom of this dreary town. Although I myself know that this love would never awaken if I never started, I stood there in the deserted wood to not have my feelings be found out by anyone.

After months of being with Miko, I began to notice her feelings for him. That was when my whole world began to crumble. Miko was still a child to me, truth be told, for she was three years younger than me. And I did not want to hate or be angry at her just because she loved the same person as myself.

No. I feel like I'm lying to myself since I knew from the start that Miko would fall for him. Her way of approaching was similar to my past self. I could not believe that finally, after years of secluding myself from society, I would naturally begin to have that "woman's intuition."

Miko was a fun child who had that beetle's black long smooth hair and perfect height for a woman. She approached Giselle, his ex, to get his attention. By "approached," I mean she dated her, though both were not serious.

I find myself always paying attention to him, no matter the situation. When I found out about my MBTI personality as an ENFP, the first thing I wanted him to be was an INFJ, for it was my compatible personality. It was such a childish way of thinking now that I think about it.

"But he was so much like an INFJ," I thought, and those thoughts were all keeping me motivated to keep learning more about my own personality and his, hopefully.

Now that I think about it, the only ever step I took to get to know him was to actually wait for the appropriate time to get to know his age. And I took that chance while Miko was talking about him and asked about their age difference. Splendidly well done.

What killed me the most was that the only person Miko brought up to talk about him was me, myself. I have always changed my personality to be more listening, ever since the case with my last friend, and now the only ever first person that came to talk to me about is how much she loves the person I loved. God had played with my fate.