After the Walls

Chapter 10

He takes the book from my lap, flips it open, and examines the note.

"Could it be his mother? We could find out where she is buried," I say.

But he shakes his head and his face falls pallid and drawn. "Elle, who has my brother been obsessed with since the dawn of time? Whose blood did he want for his sick experiments and who did he just show off to the Concaves?"

My heart sinks and my mouth tastes bitter. "Me."

"Where should you have always been?"

I click my tongue, desperate for more liquor. "The prison cell in the Red Movement. I should have never escaped."

"He must have hidden The Devil's Ivy in the building somewhere, I suspect." He paces back and forth, his turns as sharp as blades. "We were just there. How could we miss it?"

I stare at the book and heave a sigh. "You didn't know to look for an herb with strange magical properties."

"We need to find the Devil's Ivy," he growls. "Perhaps it will weaken my brother. Then I can tear out his heart."

"Woah. Let's just see what happens, okay? I'm not sure you want to kill him."

He blinks, lost for words. "You didn't actually say that. Gods, Elle. He really has gotten into your head."

"I can think for myself just fine, Ruben." My voice trembles from the surging rage. "I'm just not sure he deserves death."

His face turns beet-red. "He experimented on people, Elle. He turned them into monsters. Ajax and Aston are just shells of their former selves. And he's taken over the kingdom. Not to mention, he's stolen you away from me... I mean, he's stolen your freedom." He hangs his head and starts pacing again. "He's a psychotic manipulator, Elle. You know that."

"I know," I snap, clenching my fists.

I snatch the book from the side table and march down the aisle of shelves, sticking it back into its spot.

"Let's get back to the ball." My voice is flat. I shoulder past him, making my way through the aisle. His footsteps echoing after me fuels the blaze in my chest and I whirl around.

"You are such an idiot, Ruben," I hiss. The worlds tumble out of me like a crumbling mountain, and I cannot stop them. "You're an idiot if you ever thought for a second I stopped loving you. I sided with Edward for you. Because I loved you with such ferocity, I couldn't bear the thought of him hurting you. Or Aston and Ajax. So, I sacrificed my freedom and my morals for you. And I choose to sacrifice them again and again for you because I still love you."

"Then stop loving me!"

"I can't! You consume my every thought and dream. Even just looking at you makes me sick. Because there is nothing I can do. I have to stay the course. I must stay here and convince Edward I am with him for as long as I need. Maybe one day we can be with each other again."

His chest heaves and his forest eyes blaze. Then he stalks up to me and I go to back away. But he cups my face and kisses me. He kisses me with such force and longing and desperation we almost topple over. My walls peel away like magic. Heat scorches through me and I kiss him back, unable to stop, not for rhyme or reason, making up for the months we've been apart. Finally, finally, the world around me stops burning. Even if only for a moment.

Then all too soon, he jerks away and prowls to the door. "Let's go. Before he sends a search party."

The double doors slap together in his wake. My legs are stone for several racing heartbeats. I touch my lips, still feeling the ghost of his kiss. A strange feeling rushes through my veins. Relief. And I realize I have a habit of giving in to my destruction.

My head spins and the hallways sway as I skulk back through them, toward the ballroom. The deep bass of the cellos and the plucking of high-note strings wrap around my ears. I wish the noise would drown out my thoughts. But I must focus on one thing. And that is figuring out how on earth to travel to the Red Movement to retrieve the Devil's Ivy. And I must go this time. Besides Edward, I know the paths and rooms of the Red Movement complex the most.

I snatch a goblet of champagne from a passing servant as soon as I step into the ballroom. Edward waves at me from a throng of giggling ladies. But I ignore him. Ajax spots me from the table of food and I squeeze through the crowd. He stuffs his face with a chocolate cake, smearing the icing down his chin.

"Would you dance with me, my friend?" I say, extending my hand.

He cleans up his mess with a napkin before tossing it in a hamper under the table. "Always, Elle."

We twirl onto the dance floor. "Did Ruben kiss you?"

I blink at him, flabbergasted. "What the hell?"

He shrugs, chuckling. "I could tell something happened by the way he stomped back into the ballroom. I just guessed it was a kiss."

I roll my eyes. "It was a mistake."

He purses his lips. "Right. Now, what has gotten your pants in a twist?"

I lean forward, resting my head on his shoulder, pretending to just hug him. "We need to plan a heist."