No Reservations (A Romantic Comedy)

Chapter 26

"Phew," he said. "Because I wouldn't want to see you get hurt.

Yeah right.

"I'm not," I insisted through gritted teeth.

"I'm glad. He did say earlier that he wished he'd just asked Christine to be his date instead, that she's more his type. He prefers them slimmer, you see." Martin looked me up and down, making sure the point hit home.

And oh wow, did it hit home. And God, did it hurt.

All my insecurities came rushing back like a dam inside me had just burst. All the times I'd been upset about being curvier than my friends. The occasions I'd skipped meals before nights out so I felt thinner (once again, I'd done that tonight). The hundreds of hours I'd probably spent looking in the mirror while analysing my body's many flaws.

"I need to go." I stood up. I felt sick. Dizzy. Disbelieving.

Could Ryan really have said those things about me? Even if he wished he'd asked Christine to prom instead, surely he wouldn't have said that to his friends? And surely he wouldn't have body-shamed me like that? I needed to speak to him; needed to find out the truth.

"See you later," Martin said off-handedly. He knew he'd already caused maximum damage.

I headed back to the hall. My chest felt tight and my breathing shallow. Just speak to Ryan, I told myself, trying to calm down. He'll tell you this is all just bullshit.

But when I reached the doors to the hall the first thing I saw, practically lit up by spotlight, was Ryan kissing Christine in the middle of the dancefloor.

And, just to rub salt into my open heartache wound, a fucking Boyzone song was playing.

It seems Martin had been right after all.

Ryan didn't return my feelings.

If this had been a teen movie, I'd probably have dramatically collapsed in a ball on the floor and started screaming. Or walked straight up to Ryan and slapped him in his stupid, handsome face. But instead, strangely numb, I walked over to our table and picked up my bag.

"Iona, are you okay?" Lily asked worriedly. She'd only just returned with our drinks - Martin and Ryan had both wreaked their havoc in a shockingly short space of time - and she was watching the kiss too.

Claire was also watching, her face confused. "I don't get it," she said. "He excused himself from Christine and walked away before I even had a chance to cut in. Then he just walked back into the hall there and started kissing her."

"I don't want to know," I muttered, trying to keep my face composed. "I just need to get the hell out of here."

"Come on." Claire jumped to her feet. "Let's go." She and Lily steered me outside again. I'd left my shoes out there; who did I think I was, Cinderella? I hadn't even registered I had bare feet. "There's a taxi rank just down the street."

We piled into a taxi, my friends bookending me on either side. I relayed to them what Martin had told me, the things Ryan had said about me. About preferring Christine, that I wasn't his type because I wasn't thin enough.

"He was talking to all his friends earlier and they were all laughing; what if that was about me?" I asked hollowly. "I'm so glad I don't ever have to see any of these people again." I felt so humiliated.

Ryan had never really been interested in me. I'd clearly been imagining it this whole time. It seemed that I'd even imagined he was really my friend.

Maybe boys and girls really couldn't be friends. Even when you thought they might like you, they were actually slagging you off behind your back to their friends, using you for cheap laughs.